Sometimes, people overestimate themselves a little. Okay, a lot. And not sometimes.
And I’m sure there are times that that’s actually okay. Often, though, it isn’t. The problem: you can waste a lot of time wondering why you can’t change yourself instead of finding a real solution to the problem.
Recently, I had a rough week. I am pregnant, so I blame it on that. Anyway, I was feeling annoyed with everyone, and I snapped at my husband several times over little things that didn’t really matter. Instead of trying to figure out why I acted that way, though, and thinking, “Mollie, stop doing that. You’re not trying hard enough,” I realized that I was just weak. Some things are stronger than me—even things I seem to be able to control. I forgave myself, and I apologized to him.
And then I did something else: I told him that every time I snapped at him from then on, I would give him a little back massage.
And it worked. Within a day I was considerably less annoyed with him. Within a few days things were back to normal.
Should I have been able to stop myself from snapping at him without instituting a punishment for it? Probably. But I wasn’t. And that’s okay.
I’m not going to wake up someday and suddenly be perfect.
I’m going to be the same: weak–but happy.