Guest contributor: The talented Jon-Paul of journeytolightandlife.wordpress.com.
I admit it: I am stuck in a rut. Fortunately for me, it’s a pretty good rut, I think. Here’s what it is: Whenever I am advising others on life issues, one question that I invariably ask is, “Have you made a list?” (My co-creator has heard this so often that if I don’t bring it up, he will!)
So what is so great about making lists? Well, here’s my explanation.
I have mentioned in some of my blog posts the major upheaval that I experienced in the past few years. Seeing the end of a marriage while going through a career change was challenging, but it was the perfect thing to spur the growth that I needed. At the beginning of this upheaval, I started the practice that has become my rut: the practice of making lists. By lists, I do not mean shopping or to-do lists—I mean taking time to focus on where I am and where I want to be and to codify this in writing.
My first try at a “life list” was my description of what my life would be like once I had finished the long tunnel of change that I had found myself in. Unfortunately, I didn’t save the list, but I do remember that on it were my having a good job (check!), attending school (check!) and having a strong support network (double check!). I had actually forgotten about this list for a long time and when I rediscovered it, all but one of the items on the list had come to fruition!
In the time between creating this first list and the rediscovery of the same, I had done a lot of reading on the law of attraction and have found a few things to be true.
First, the law of attraction is a universal law that, like gravity, is in effect despite our awareness. When we spend time thinking about something, we create a vibration in the universe that attracts that which we are thinking of. Thus, my spending the time to focus on what I wanted from my life, I sent out the vibration into the universe that made it so–even without my being aware of it happening.
Second, the making of list is actually an exercise in sharpening your intention and defining or clarifying your ideal. Does this mean that the list cannot be changed once done? Certainly not! You may make a list, for example, that includes having a certain type of car, but then you discover that the car does not suit you. After that, you simply make the change and the universe will keep up with you.
Finally, creating good feeling emotions around a list actually adds power to it.
Here’s an example of these points: On August 18, 2011, I sat down while on my lunch break and created a list of traits that I wanted my future co-creator (life partner) to have. Some samples from this list:
- On a spiritual path that is similar to mine or will allow and support mine;
- Someone who reads; and
- Someone who will allow for and create space for me to be who I am and who will be who they truly are as well.
These are just a few of the items on my list. Some of the items were “deep” and others superficial, but all were equally important.
Once this list was done, I took a few moments at lunch each day to focus on what I’d written and (more importantly) the way that I would feel having this co-creator in my life. Then, on September 17, 2011, less than a month later, I had my first date with my co-creator. Of the 21 items on my list, he is all but one (someone who reads–while my co-creator does not read books, he does read magazines and other sources and is more than able to engage in meaningful conversation, which was my intent).
In his book The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho says it perfectly: “…When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.” When someone is looking for a house, the real estate agent will often have them make a list of things that they are looking for. The agent may even ask the client to prioritize this list to identify the “must have’s” and the “nice to have’s.” Seems completely reasonable, doesn’t it? It is simply a way of defining the desired end result.
The same concepts are at work when we sit and make a list of how we want our lives to be; what we choose is up to us alone, and will help us determine what is most important in our lives.
So, have you made a list?
After Rachel and Matthew had their first child, they had a couple of fights. Well, okay, more than a couple—they fought for over three years. They fought about schedules. They fought about bad habits. They even fought about the lawn mower. And besides actually having their child, it was the best thing that could've happened. Get Fights You’ll Have After Having a Baby: A Self-Help Story on Amazon now.