Thanks to a hunch and a great title, I purchased Sex, Drugs and Meditation on Amazon–and liked it even more than I expected I would. So I wrote the author, Mary-Lou Stephens, to ask if I could interview her for this site and for an upcoming book of mine. She kindly agreed. (And she was even willing to challenge my beliefs below, which I loved!)
Mollie: Right now I’m working on a book about examining and questioning deeply-held beliefs. The top spiritual beliefs I’ve found within myself so far, which are explained further in the book, are: spirituality is good; life is a game; there are no rules; people are holy; absolutes are fine, but certainty is not; happiness is the truth; God is simply reality–nothing more; and acceptance is “where it’s at.” What do you think? Agree or no?
Mary-Lou:
1. Spirituality is good.
To quote Shakespeare, “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” I don’t think spiritual people are better than non-spiritual people or vice versa. Many people live good, happy and useful lives without any sense of spirituality.
2. Life is a game.
Life is what it is. It’s what we make of it. We get to chose what it is through how we think about it. The word “game” to me is too loaded with meaning. It’s possible to cheat when playing a game, and there are winners and losers. Also, to me, a game is too impersonal, too superficial. Life is an ever-unfolding wonder. Sometimes games are involved. I love playing Scrabble, but life as a game? No, that doesn’t resonate for me.
3. There are no rules.
I believe in boundaries, good healthy demarcations, but are these rules? No. I believe in working out what makes life better for me and those around me and living within that paradigm. As I mentioned before, when I was growing up in a Christian household I thought I had to obey all the rules to be worthy of love, and there were a lot of rules. I didn’t feel loved, no matter what I did. In 12-step programs I discovered that working the steps made my life a whole lot better so I was happy to keep working them again and again. Working those steps made my life work. With meditation I have found that life flows a lot easier. I don’t work the steps anymore. I have no schedule of spirituality I have to adhere to. I just live.
4. People are holy.
I do believe that God is in everyone. We are all part of the One. But once again, “holy” is a loaded word so I’m going to disagree with this one, too!
5. Absolutes are fine. Certainty is not.
There are no certainties, no absolutes. Everything changes, all the time. It’s the nature of the Universe.
6. We have power.
Yes, we have power. We have the power of choice. We can choose what we say, how we respond, how we spend our time, how we treat others. This is power.
7. Happiness is the truth.
Totally disagree with this one. Happiness is a fleeting feeling. The truth is everlasting.
8. God is reality—nothing more.
God is a paradox, everywhere and nowhere, everything and nothing, immeasurable and infinite. God may not even exist. But there is a strong sense within me that s/he does.
9. Acceptance. It’s where it’s at.
Yep! I love acceptance. it gives me so much more space and time to do the things I love to do. I’ve stopped fighting. It was all useless anyway. In the end, even the victories I had mean nothing. Acceptance brings me joy.
Mollie: Do you practice acceptance of what is in a conscious way with the goal of greater inner peace?
Mary-Lou: I practice acceptance every day. It gets easier as I get older, or perhaps I’ve just had more practice. I don’t practice acceptance with any goal in mind. I practice it because it’s easier than any alternative I’ve found … and I’ve tried quite a few. Ranting and railing, pushing the river, complaining, playing the victim, playing the star, being a martyr … none of these proved very successful. Acceptance is a much more peaceful way to be. It’s not a goal, it just is.
Mollie: When and how did you begin this practice? How has it affected your life?
Mary-Lou: I first learned about acceptance in 12-step programs. The Serenity Prayer was a revelation to me. I always thought it was my job to change other people, places and things. When I discovered the only thing I could change was myself I felt as though a huge weight had been lifted from me. I didn’t have to be responsible for all that stuff I thought I was responsible for; in fact, I couldn’t be responsible for it and didn’t have any business trying to be. I just let it all go. This gave me incredible freedom. As my meditation practice grew and became stronger so did my ability to be a witness to what was going on around me without having to buy into it. Being able to witness my own thoughts was an amazing breakthrough. I am not my thoughts … which is just as well because they’re crazy!
Mollie: Can you offer any advice to people who would like to learn how to be more accepting of hardship and to use it to their benefit?
Mary-Lou: Don’t blame yourself. Don’t blame your karma. Things just happen. Most times it has nothing to do with you. It’s horrible and it’s hard but it’s not personal. God, the Universe or karma are not out to get you. Learn the lesson and move on. Also, don’t expect to get over hurts or grief quickly. You won’t. And some things will be with you for the rest of your life. Once I learnt to accept that, I was a lot more peaceful. I used to think I had to rise above the bad, forgive everything and everyone, not have any negative thoughts, blah, blah, blah. Now I know I’m not perfect and I don’t expect to be. Some feelings stick with us for a reason–as a warning or as a blessing. Many situations I’ve been through have helped me to relate to others better. They’ve also been beneficial when offering a shoulder or an ear.
Mollie: What are a few of your foundational spiritual beliefs?
Mary-Lou: When I was growing up my parents were heavily involved with the Charismatic Christian movement—lots of speaking in tongues and prophesying, healing and excitement. As a child I was very much wrapped up in that world … a world where God was love but also any negative feelings or misgivings were pushed away and ignored. If you felt bad, clearly you weren’t praying hard enough. As a teenager I felt bad all the time and so became increasingly disenchanted with those that were reaching to heaven but ignoring what was going on at their feet. In twelve-step programs I was told I could believe in a God of my own understanding. God could be a color, the sun, the wind or anything I wanted, just as long as God was a power greater than myself. This was liberating. Slowly, and with a few missteps, I developed a relationship with a God of my own understanding, one that had nothing to do with religion or other people’s beliefs. This God was a God I could rely on, lean on, talk to, be reassured by. I didn’t have to be good for this God to love me. I didn’t have to do penance or chant the right prayers or go to church. This God loved me just as I was, no matter what I did … but living a life of good thoughts and actions helped me love and live with myself.
These days, God just is. God is in everything, everywhere—a benign, loving presence. This gives me a sense of peace.
Mollie:What are the specific spiritual practices that you prefer (i.e., journaling, meditation, etc.)?
Mary-Lou: I used to use specific techniques—journaling, meditating at a set time for a set amount of time and the like—but now acceptance, witnessing my thoughts and meditation are all part of my day. I don’t put them in specific time slots. It’s more like breathing. It just is without me having to do anything.
Mollie: What do you mean by witnessing your thoughts?
Mary-Lou: I observe my thoughts and decide whether or not to engage with them. This is a benefit of meditation. In meditation I don’t try to stop my thoughts (impossible!). Instead, I watch them as they do their crazy dance. The more I observe my thoughts, the more I realize how funny they are. And to think they used to rule my world. No wonder I was so unhappy. I believed what I was thinking was true when most of it is just reaction and craving. Life is a lot more peaceful now and although peace and happiness might have been my goal when I first started meditating I don’t think about goals at all anymore. So many goals are counter-productive.
Mollie: Do you practice acceptance of what is in a conscious way with the goal of greater inner peace?
Mary-Lou: I practice acceptance every day. It gets easier as I get older, perhaps because I’ve just had more practice. I don’t practice acceptance with any goal in mind. I practice it because it’s easier than any alternative I’ve found … and I’ve tried quite a few: ranting and railing, pushing the river, complaining, playing the victim, playing the star, being a martyr … none of these proved very successful. Acceptance is a much more peaceful way to be. It’s not a goal, it just is.
Mollie: When and how did you begin this practice? How has it affected your life?
Mary-Lou: I first learned about acceptance in twelve-step programs. The Serenity Prayer was a revelation to me. I always thought it was my job to change other people, places and things. When I discovered the only thing I could change was myself I felt as though a huge weight had been lifted from me. I didn’t have to be responsible for all that stuff I thought I was responsible for; in fact, I couldn’t be responsible for it and didn’t have any business trying to be. I just let it all go. This gave me incredible freedom. As my meditation practice grew and became stronger, so did my ability to be a witness to what was going on around me without my having to buy into it. Being able to witness my own thoughts was an amazing breakthrough. I am not my thoughts … which is just as well because they’re crazy!
Mollie: Can you offer any advice to people who would like to learn how to be more accepting of hardship and to use it to their benefit?
Mary-Lou: Don’t blame yourself. Don’t blame your karma. Things just happen. Most times it has nothing to do with you. It’s horrible and it’s hard but it’s not personal. God, the Universe or karma are not out to get you. Learn the lesson and move on. Also, don’t expect to get over hurts or grief quickly. You won’t. And some things will be with you for the rest of your life. Once I learnt to accept that, I was a lot more peaceful. I used to think I had to rise above the bad, forgive everything and everyone, not have any negative thoughts, blah, blah, blah. Now I know I’m not perfect and I don’t expect to be. Some feelings stick with us for a reason—as a warning or as a blessing. Many situations I’ve been through have helped me to relate to others better. They’ve also been beneficial when offering a shoulder or an ear.
Thanks to a hunch and a great title, I purchased Sex, Drugs and Meditation on Amazon–and liked it even more than I expected I would. So I wrote the author, Mary-Lou Stephens, to ask if I could share a true law of attraction success story from the book on this site. She kindly agreed.
Here is the story of how Mary-Lou got started in her long, fulfilling radio career after years of playing in bands. It begins when she runs into an acquaintance, Chris, just after her band broke up.
“I knew Chris, one of the announcers, would be [at the event]. He’d interviewed me about my music a few times and occasionally played my songs on his program. We had formed a friendship.
“He was pleased to see me, even in the circumstances, and suggested we meet up for lunch while I was in town. Later that week we ate and talked about life and death. I poured my heart out about the band breaking up. I told Chris how it had left me devastated and unsure of what to do next. Even though . . . my troubles seemed trivial, it still hurt . . .
“When I finished he paused, looked at me and uttered one life-changing sentence. ‘Mary-Lou, you want to be in radio.’
“I knew he was right. It was a pure light bulb moment. I could feel the glow above my head.
“‘I do.’ It was astounding. ‘But I didn’t know that until right now. How did you know?’
“‘Because I know radio and I know you. It’s a perfect match.’
“It was true. I came alive when I was being interviewed in a radio studio. I loved the sense of performance. I’d performed all my life in one form or another. Radio condensed performance down to one person, one microphone, one listener. A pure connection. I’d almost forgotten that I had presented a show on community radio in Hobart when I was in my early twenties. It was supposed to be an arts show. I interviewed musicians and bands. My natural curiosity was given a legitimate outlet. But when I left Hobart for acting school in Melbourne I never gave radio another thought.
“Until now.
“I stayed in Hobart for a few more days and caught up with a friend. She suggested we check out the short films being shown at the AFTRS graduate screenings. AFTRS was the most prestigious film and TV school in Australia and she was keen to see what the new young filmmakers were doing. During the intermission the dean talked about the school.
“‘The Australian Film, Television and Radio School . . .’ he began. And that’s when I stopped listening. Radio school? It was always called the Film and TV School. I knew people who had studied there. I’d even been to the campus in Sydney, and no one ever mentioned a radio component. Until that night I’d never realised the R in AFTRS stood for radio.
“This was too close to be coincidence, only days after Chris had told me I should be in radio, this was a sign.
. . .
“Within a week of arriving back in Sydney I bumped into Simon. He and I moved in the same circle of musicians and artists.
“‘I’ve been trying to track you down,’ he said. ‘I’m now the program director for a new aspirant public radio station.’
“‘What’s that?’ I heard the word radio. The rest was unfamiliar.
“‘We don’t have a full licence yet but we’re working towards it. At the moment we broadcast in two to four week blocks whenever we’re given a frequency. I was hoping you’d present a show for us. Are you interested?’
‘”‘You want me to do a radio show?’
“‘I think you’d be great. What do you say?’
“Within a week of discovering my true vocation I was being offered a gig on air. Another sign. A miracle! I said yes.”
Mary-Lou Stephens
For more information on this law of attraction author and story, see:
It’s not really New Age. (No one seems to love that term, do they?) It’s not really New Thought, since that’s more specific. And it sure as heck isn’t Buddhist, Christian, Jewish or any other more easily defined belief system.
It’s the brand of spirituality we sometimes call “spiritual but not religious.” Even though we know that it’s a terrible term. I mean, it’s a good, accurate way to describe my philosophy and that of a rapidly growing segment of society. But man, is it a mouthful. Maybe we need to use the acronym instead: SBNR. Okay, maybe we don’t.
Let’s do “alternative spirituality” instead.
Here, then, is my Other Best Alternative Spirituality Books list. It follows on the heels of a handful of other, more specific Best Alternative Spirituality Book lists. This is the stuff that is not easily labeled–the stuff that bookstores don’t quite know what to do with, the stuff they might stick in the Spiritual/Inspirational or the New Age category and call it good. Of course, there are plenty more books on my lists that could fit into this category, too. However, if there’s a more specific list on my site that fits it better, I chose to just keep it there.
I chose the books in the first section because they inspired me deeply, changed me for the better and helped me find greater inner peace. The second section features many of the other general inspirational books I’ve come across but may not have read yet.
By the way, don’t let the title fool you: This is one of my favorite book categories. These books are a bit different, but in a good way.
Other Best Alternative Spirituality Books
The Work of Byron Katie: An Introduction, Byron Katie Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life, Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell Who Would You Be Without Your Story?: Dialogues with Byron Katie, Byron Katie I Need Your Love – Is That True?: How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them, Byron Katie and Michael Katz A Thousand Names for Joy: Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are, Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell A Mind at Home With Itself: How Asking Four Questions Can Free Your Mind, Open Your Heart and Turn Your World Around, Byron Katie What I Know for Sure, Oprah Winfrey The Shack, William Young Mere Christianity, C.S. Lewis Heretics, G.K. Chesterton
Other Recommended Alternative Spirituality Books
Byron Katie
Various Audio and Video Recordings, Byron Katie and Byron Katie International Question Your Thinking, Change The World: Quotations from Byron Katie, Byron Katie A Friendly Universe: Sayings to Inspire and Challenge You, Byron Katie Loving What Is: 52 Meditations on Reality (Card Deck), Byron Katie Byron Katie’s “Katieisms”: Inner Wisdom Cards (Card Deck), Byron Katie and Hans Wilhelm
Gary Zukav
The Dancing Wu Li Masters: An Overview of the New Physics, Gary Zukav The Seat of the Soul, Gary Zukav Thoughts from the Seat of the Soul, Gary Zukav The Heart of the Soul: Emotional Awareness, Gary Zukav and Linda Francis Thoughts from the Heart of the Soul: Meditations for Emotional Awareness, Gary Zukav and Linda Francis The Mind of the Soul: Responsible Choice, Gary Zukav and Linda Francis Self-Empowerment Journal: A Companion to The Mind of the Soul: Responsible Choice, Gary Zukav and Linda Francis Spiritual Partnership, Gary Zukav Soul to Soul, Gary Zukav Soul Stories, Gary Zukav
Don Miguel Ruiz
The Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz The Fifth Agreement: A Practical Guide to Self-Mastery (Toltec Wisdom), Don Miguel Ruiz and Don Jose Ruiz The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship, Don Miguel Ruiz The Four Agreements Companion Book: Using The Four Agreements to Master the Dream of Your Life, Don Miguel Ruiz Prayers: A Communion with Our Creator, Don Miguel Ruiz Wisdom from the Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz Wisdom from the Mastery of Love, Don Miguel Ruiz The Voice of Knowledge: A Practical Guide To Inner Peace, Don Miguel Ruiz The Toltec Art of Life and Death, Don Miguel Ruiz
Marianne Williamson
A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of a “Course in Miracles,” Marianne Williamson The Law of Divine Compensation: On Work, Money, and Miracles, Marianne Williamson Enchanted Love: The Mystical Power of Intimate Relationships, Marianne Williamson Imagine What America Could Be in the 21st Century: Visions of a Better Future from Leading American Thinkers, Marianne Williamson Healing the Soul of America: Reclaiming Our Voices as Spiritual Citizens, Marianne Williamson A Woman’s Worth, Marianne Williamson Everyday Grace: Having Hope, Finding Forgiveness, And Making Miracles, Marianne Williamson Illuminata: A Return to Prayer, Marianne Williamson The Gift of Change, Marianne Williamson
David R. Hawkins
Power Versus Force: The Hidden Determinants of Human Behavior, David Hawkins Letting Go: The Pathway of Surrender, David R. Hawkins Transcending the Levels of Consciousness: The Stairway to Enlightenment, David R. Hawkins Transcending the Levels of Consciousness: Live Your Life Like a Prayer, David R. Hawkins Success Is for You: Using Heart-Centered Power Principles for Lasting Abundance and Fulfillment, David R. Hawkins The Eye of the I: From Which Nothing Is Hidden, David R. Hawkins Truth vs Falsehood:How to Tell the Difference, David R. Hawkins I: Reality and Subjectivity, David R. Hawkins Dissolving the Ego, Realizing the Self: Contemplations from the Teachings of David R. Hawkins, David R. Hawkins and Scott Jeffrey Discovery of the Presence of God: Devotional NonDuality, David R. Hawkins Reality, Spirituality and Modern Man, David R. Hawkins Dealing with the CrazyMakers in Your Life: Setting Boundaries on Unhealthy Relationships, David R. Hawkins Along the Path to Enlightenment: 365 Daily Reflections from David R. Hawkins, David R. Hawkins and Scott Jeffrey The Ultimate David Hawkins Library, David R. Hawkins When Pleasing Others Is Hurting You: Finding God’s Patterns for Healthy Relationships, David R. Hawkins Breaking Everyday Addictions: Finding Freedom from the Things That Trip Us Up, David R. Hawkins Never Fight Again . . . Guaranteed!: Groundbreaking Practices for a Win-Win Marriage, David R. Hawkins The Power of Emotional Decision Making: Using Your God-Given Emotions for Positive Change, David R. Hawkins Stumbling Toward Obedience: Learning from Jonah’s Failure to Love God and the People He Came to Save, David R. Hawkins The Clear Pathway to Enlightenment-Four CD Set, David R. Hawkins Project Y: The Los Alamos Story. Part I: Toward Trinity. Part II: Beyond Trinity, David R. Hawkins and Edith C. Truslow In the World, but Not of It: Living Spiritually in the Modern World, David R. Hawkins Healing and Recovery, David R. Hawkins The Discovery: Revealing the Presence of God in your Life, David R. Hawkins Normal People Do the Craziest Things, David R. Hawkins
Carol Tuttle
Remembering Wholeness: A Personal Handbook for Thriving in the 21st Century, Carol Tuttle It’s Just My Nature!, Carol Tuttle The Path to Wholeness: A Guide to Spiritual Healing & Empowerment for Survivors of Child Sexual & Spiritual Abuse, Carol Tuttle
Other Authors
The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho Burn, Baby, Burn, Evan Griffith Indigo Adults: Understanding Who You Are and What You Can Become, Kabir Jaffe and Ritama Davidson Personal Development for Smart People, Steve Pavlina Human Design: Discover the Person You Were Born to Be, Chetan Parkyn and Steve Dennis Understanding Human Design: The New Science of Astrology: Discover Who You Really Are, Karen Curry Human Design: The Definitive Book of Human Design, The Science of Differentiation, Ra Uru Hu and Lynda Bunnell The Open Secret, Tony Parsons Butterflies Are Free to Fly, Stephen Davis The Book on the Taboo Against Knowing Who You Are, Alan Watts Keys to the Ultimate Freedom, Lester Levinson Past the Gate, Esther Teule God Goes to Work, Tom Zender The Outlook Beautiful, Lilian Whiting Kitchen Table Wisdom, Rachel Naomi Remen The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values, and Spiritual Growth, Scott Peck Messages from Water and the Universe, Masaru Emoto Add More Ing to Your Life: A Hip Guide to Happiness, Gabrielle Bernstein In Search of the Miraculous, P. D. Ouspensky Grace, Gaia, and the End of Days: An Alternative Way for the Advanced Soul, Stuart Wilde Live Your Bliss, Terry Cole-Whittaker What You Think of Me is None of My Business, Terry Cole-Whittaker The Future of Love, Daphne Rose Kingma Mystery Teachings From the Living Earth: An Introduction to Spiritual Ecology, John Mihael Greer The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know Is Possible, Charles Eisenstein Living in the Heart: How to Enter into the Sacred Space within the Heart, Drunvalo Melchizedek Adventures of the Soul: Journeys Through the Physical and Spiritual Dimensions, James Van Praagh The Sculptor in the Sky, Teal Scott The Passion Test: The Effortless Path to Discovering Your Life Purpose, Janet Attwood and Chris Attwood The Soul’s Code: In Search of Character and Calling, James Hillman Living A Course in Miracles: An Essential Guide to the Classic Text, Jon Mundy PhD Kinship with All Life, J. Allen Boone The Reconnection: Heal Others, Heal Yourself, Eric Pearl The Seeker’s Guide, Elizabeth Lesser The Untethered Soul, Michael A. Singer Tao Te Ching, Stephen Mitchell A Monk in the World: Cultivating a Spiritual Life, Wayne Teasdale
This self-help success story was contributed by Jenny Thorne.
In the very famous book by Robert Cialdini called Influence, he tells a story that has been co-opted many times since, and now, I think I’ll do it again.
Beginning in the year 1961, Yale University conducted a set of frightening psychological experiments on a mix of average people. Bear with me a few moments—this is a little complicated. (But worth it.)
In each iteration of this study, three roles were played: the subject, the button pusher, and the director. The idea was simple: the button pusher would attempt to teach the subject, who was sitting in a different room, a set of word pairs. Then the button pusher would test the subject’s learning ability. When the subject responded incorrectly, the director (wearing a white lab coat) would tell the button pusher (the actual subject of the experiment) to deliver electric shocks of increasing intensity to the subject by—you guessed it—pressing a button.
Of course, the set up was a bit of a sham. No actual electrical current was delivered, but the subject made a convincing show of suffering, anyway.
The results of the study and subsequent studies shocked the researchers and the public alike: 65 percent of the button pushers complied with the researcher’s demands and pushed the torture button until the highest level of pain (an excruciating 450 volts) was delivered repeatedly—despite the fierce cries and protests of the subjects.
When the results of this study were announced to the public, they apparently caused quite a media frenzy. Respected analysts and psychologists made pessimistic observations about the evil inherent in human nature and society. What the journalists apparently did not reveal, however, was this:
The button pushers were in absolute anguish a great deal of the time.
They paced. They protested. They cried—even grown men cried. They begged not to be required to go on.
They didn’t want to do it at all.
In Influence and other analyses of this fascinating study, a clear conclusion is drawn: People in general put a great undue trust in authority. We listen to our leaders—or the people we perceive to be our leaders—and do almost anything they ask, whatever the consequences may be.
And I agree with this idea. In fact, I could not possibly agree more. However, there is a second conclusion to be made, and personally, I think it’s even more important than the first: People are almost totally unaware that the source of their greatest anguish is not other people.
It is themselves.
At any point in time during this experiment, any of the button pushers could have ended the torture of both the subject and themselves by doing one simple thing.
They could’ve stopped pushing the button.
Here’s the thing: We are powerful. Our minds–our beliefs–are the source of our greatest pain, as well as our only true joy. And yet, as many times as we New Agey-types say this, repeat this, remind ourselves of this, we often seem to forget it.
When I first came across Byron Katie’s website, there was a prominently displayed quote that went something like this: “The Work has one purpose: To end suffering.”
And I thought, Yeah, right, you guys. Everything I need to end suffering is right here, on this website.
A reasonable reaction, maybe. But that was long before I ever put The Work to the test.
What is The Work?
For those of you who are not familiar with The Work, here is a brief description from thework.com: “The Work is a simple yet powerful process of inquiry that teaches you to identify and question the thoughts that cause all the suffering in the world. It’s a way to understand what’s hurting you, and to address the cause of your problems with clarity. In its most basic form, The Work consists of four questions and the turnarounds.”
The questions are:
Is it true? (Yes or no. If no, move to 3.)
Can you absolutely know that it’s true? (Yes or no.)
How do you react, what happens, when you believe that thought?
Who would you be without the thought?
Pretty simple, right? And yet, The Work is one of the most powerful spiritual techniques I’ve ever tried. It combines well-known cognitive psychology principles (CBT is similar, and similarly amazing), neuroscience (brain rewiring theory, and all that), and–you guessed it–spirituality to address anything and everything that ails you.
And it delivers.
Can you be more specific?
Here are some of the negative thoughts I’ve freed (or partially freed) myself from through this method, just during the first two months of practicing it:
I’m not thin enough.
I’m not accomplishing enough.
I’m annoyed by [insert person’s name].
I’m angry at [insert person’s name].
I want to work more.
I don’t want to breastfeed anymore.
Another thought that I’m not totally rid of yet, but that I’ve already made inroads against: “I am depressed.”
Really? That doesn’t seem possible.
It’s true.
What do you mean, you’ve freed yourself from these thoughts?
I mean that when they come, they don’t feel as strong to me anymore. They are there, then I recall The Work that I did on the thought and how I turned it around, and it sort of makes its way through me to somewhere else. They’re not quite real anymore. I don’t take them so seriously.
And for depression, a condition that may be physically-based? Does it work for this, too?
Absolutely. I can honestly say that before The Work and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which is very similar but not quite as powerful as The Work, I was never entirely convinced I could one day be completely free from depression. Now, I am.
But it will take time. This is not an overnight miracle cure. It takes, as the name suggests, work. Depression has made such deep inroads–superhighways, really–in my mind. All that needs to be slowly undone.
If it’s this amazing, why doesn’t everyone know about it?
People find The Work when the time is right. Also, Byron Katie’s ideas are pretty darn controversial. In her world, the problem is never the other person; it’s always you. “No exceptions.” Change your perspective, and you won’t suffer anymore, she says–no matter what anyone else does to you. A lot of people are stuck in victimhood.
Anything else we should know?
I cannot do The Work justice in this blog post. Rather than attempt the impossible, then, I direct you to one of my favorite Byron Katie YouTube videos ever (and that’s saying a lot, since I’ve been binge-watching them every chance I get). In it, Katie helps a distraught woman plagued with guilt over a relationship mistake see the truth of the situation.
Me: Sometimes, we’re happy just because we’re happy. Other times, it takes a lot of work. What do you tell people who, unlike you, struggle with negativity and other emotional stuff on a daily basis?
Leta: My advice is to love what is. Just that.
Me: How? Can you give me a much clearer, more practical idea of what’s going on in your head as you are loving and appreciating throughout your day? Maybe a small example of a few moments inside your head?
Leta: Often, my head is just saying, “I love God.” I have thoughts. I’m human, after all. But my head is empty probably a lot more than most humans.
I will meet people I don’t like. I will encounter things and situations I don’t like. They may even be grotesque to my sensibilities. However, I am challenged to love the divine within all things. I am challenged to be One with all things. I am challenged to broaden my perspective so that I find the divine innocence at the heart of everything. I am challenged to love and accept everyone, even people I don’t like. If I meet someone I don’t like, I ask myself if this is a situation I can change. Am I willing to put forth the effort to like them (which would mean changing everything about myself, going into another personality and being someone I am not)? The answer is no. However, I can see the divine innocence in them. I can understand them and love them even though I may not like them. None of it scares me. I love it all. I have a relationship with myself that allows for constant self-inquiry leading to understanding and love that takes me beyond the disconnected to the connected. I have so much fun.
If you don’t love a great dear neath experience book, check your pulse; you’re probably already dead. (Miss you.) That said, books in this sub-genre are not all created equal. Some are super inspiring, while others just aren’t quite to my taste. A lot of them come from a religious perspective I don’t agree with and others are, well, a bit corny. That said, the stories themselves (sans lesson plan) can be interesting regardless.
I chose the books in the first list below because I’ve read and enjoyed them and because they offer good, practical life advice. If you want to get more immersed the subject, though, try the books in the “Other Recommended Near Death Experience Books” section. I chose them because they’re either well-known, seemingly well-researched, or just recommended on some website somewhere. (High standards, I know.)
My favorite book from this list: Dying To Be Me: My Journey from Cancer, to Near Death, to True Healing by Anita-Moorjani. That book is definitely my friend.
Dying To Be Me: My Journey from Cancer, to Near Death, to True Healing, Anita-Moorjani Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife, Eben Alexander Life After Life: The Bestselling Original Investigation That Revealed “Near-Death Experiences”, Raymond Moody Science and the Near-Death Experience: How Consciousness Survives Death, Chris Carter Visions, Trips, and Crowded Rooms: Who and What You See Before You Die, David Kessler
Other Recommended Near Death Experience Books
Application of Impossible Things: A Near Death Experience in Iraq, Natalie Sudman Mindsight: Near-Death and Out-of-Body Experiences in the Blind, Kenneth Ring Imagine Heaven: Near-Death Experiences, God’s Promises, and the Exhilarating Future That Awaits You, John Burke and Don Piper Beyond Sight: The True Story of a Near-Death Experience, Marion Rome Near Death in the ICU: Stories from Patients Near Death and Why We Should Listen to Them, Laurin Bellg MD Evidence of the Afterlife: The Science of Near-Death Experiences, Jeffrey Long and Paul Perry God and the Afterlife: The Groundbreaking New Evidence for God and Near-Death Experience, Jeffrey Long and Paul Perry My Journey to Heaven: What I Saw and How It Changed My Life, Marvin J. Besteman and Lorilee Craker Love The Person You’re With: Life-Changing Insights from the Most Compelling Near-Death Experiences Ever Recorded, David Sunfellow Dying to Wake Up: A Doctor’s Voyage into the Afterlife and the Wisdom He Brought Back, Rajiv Parti and Raymond Moody Life After Death, Powerful Evidence You Will Never Die, Stephen Hawley Martin Real Messages From Heaven: And Other True Stories of Miracles, Divine Intervention and Supernatural Occurrences, Faye Aldridge Near-Death Experiences, The Rest of the Story: What They Teach Us About Living and Dying and Our True Purpose, P. M. H. Atwater Embraced By The Light, Betty J. Eadie Consciousness Beyond Life: The Science of the Near-Death Experience, Pim van Lommel Near-Death Experiences Examined: Medical Findings and Testimonies from Lourdes, Patrick Theillier Awakenings from the Light: 12 Life Lessons from a Near Death Experience, Nancy Rynes Near-Death Experiences as Evidence for the Existence of God and Heaven: A Brief Introduction in Plain Language, J. Steve Miller and Jeffrey Long Near Death Experiences of Doctors and Scientists: Doctors, and Scientists Describe Their Personal Near-Death Experiences, John J. Graden Wisdom of Near-Death Experiences: How Understanding NDEs Can Help Us Live More Fully, Penny Sartori and Pim van Lommel The Night I Spoke to God: A Miraculous True Story of A Near-Death Experience, Michael L. Eads The Gifts of Near-Death Experiences: You Don’t Have to Die to Experience Your True Home, Sheila Fabricant Linn and Dennis Linn How To Stop Negative Thoughts: What My Near-Death-Experience Taught Me About Mind Loops, Neuroscience, and Happiness, Barbara Ireland Surviving Death: A Journalist Investigates Evidence for an Afterlife, Leslie Kean NDE: They Went To Heaven And Back – Stories of People That Got A Second Chance, Gerard Radcliff The Big Book of Near-Death Experiences: The Ultimate Guide to What Happens When We Die, P.M.H. Atwater
Me: What is the essence of meditation? What is it, really?
Leta: What is real about meditation other than the practice of being present in your body, experiencing an IS-ness and connecting to a bigger-than-small-you field? There is no real meditation in my experience. Anything that promotes a feeling of bigger-than-small-you experience is a meditation. It can be folding the laundry, washing the dishes, sitting down on the toilet and so much more! There is meditation in everything. It is how you approach the experience that counts. Like a plug, we can plug in anything we do in our daily lives into the socket of “bigger-than-small-me” experience. This is the key to meditation in my experience.
What could be better than a great alternative spirituality book that’s also free? Not much. Not much at all. But if you’ve ever done a Google search for “free spiritual ebook” or “free alternative spirituality ebook,” you know it’s not that easy. There are thousands and thousands of these volumes online, some from ages ago and some published just last week. Where do you start?
My advice: Start with the classics. Not just any of the classics, though; the ones that have received wide appreciation. Then take my advice (and the advice of others) on the modern stuff.
I chose these books because they inspired me deeply, changed me for the better, and helped me find greater inner peace. Let me know what else is out there that deserves to be here and I will gratefully update this list.
Best Free Alternative Spirituality Ebooks
The Work of Byron Katie: An Introduction, Byron Katie Beginning Your Love Revolution, Matt Kahn Hoist on My Own Petard: Or: How Writing 10% Happier Threw My Own Advice Right Back in My Face, Dan Harris Autobiography of A Yogi, Paramahansa Yogananda As a Man Thinketh, James Allen Secret of the Ages, Robert Collier Be Still, Emmet Fox Think and Grow Rich, Napolean Hill Science of Mind, Ernest Holmes Feeling Is The Secret, Neville Goddard The Power of Positive Thinking, Norman Vincent Peale Scientific Christian Mental Practice, Emma Curtis Hopkins The Practice of the Presence of God, Brother Lawrence 100 Daily Messages Volumes One through Four, Leta Hamilton and Archangel Michael
This self-help success story was contributed by Jack Wright.
For several months, I had a mantra. A long one, one that I made up that said everything I wanted to remember each day. Since I haven’t had a whole lot of luck with many other types of meditation (I’ve pretty much always used mantras as a focal point during sitting practice rather than focusing on the breath or just clearing my mind), I figured I might as well make it a good, complete one. Each stanza is, for me, a consolidation of a great spiritual principle that upon contemplation can allow us to feel the feeling of feeling good (my definition of the state of meditation).
Here is the mantra that I used:
Angels, guides, God and all there is,
1. Please. Please. Help. Help.
2. Notice. Notice. Accept. Accept.
3. Surrender. Surrender. Flow. Flow.
4. Love. Love. Give. Give.
5. Body. Body. Energy. Energy.
6. Thank you. Thank you. Life. Life.
I love this mantra. I love mantras in general, actually. And yet, I don’t use this one anymore. In fact, for the past year or so, I’ve used mantras only sporadically. Why is this? The reason is simple: other spiritual practices took precedent.
I just don’t have time for them all.
Here, a self-interview about using this practice for depression.
So do you recommend mantra meditation for depression, or not?
Absolutely. I have a strong feeling that I will circle back to it–maybe even to using it daily–after my Byron Katie obsession is no longer in the critical learning period.
And mantras in general? Do they help, too? Or is it best to combine them with meditation?
Mantras are just mantras. Unless they’re used in a certain way, in a meditative frame of mind, they’re just not all that effective.
I remember a time several years back when I thought I wanted to buy a particular house. So one day I said this mantra over and over for, like, a solid hour while doing yoga: “This is my house.” And I didn’t feel at peace about it at all–and I did not end up buying that house (thank God).
So what was the difference?
First, the mantra should be something that feels deeply right to you. Something that really increases your peace. And second, the mantra should be something you use as a means to an end–achieving a state of meditation–not as an end in itself.
So does that mean you shouldn’t use mantras while doing the laundry or at work?
Not at all. Sit-down meditation is awesome, but you can meditate anytime. I call this “walking meditation.”
How effective is mantra meditation for depression, really?
The thing about being depressed is that it’s really, really hard to boost yourself up out of it using the usual methods. I can remember so many times that I tried to force myself out of a bad mood using some kind of sitting or walking meditation, usually with a mantra, and just ended up more pissed off and frustrated. Maybe I’m just really bad at it (actually, I’m pretty sure this is the case). But I have a feeling I’m not the only one with this problem.
Sometimes it works really well. Other times, it’s just not enough. Personally, I’ve found that meditation is best when I’m already feeling either emotionally neutral (it then kicks me into a bit of a high) or already positive (it then kicks me into an awesome high). When I’m actually depressed, I need something … stronger.
I love buying books for myself. Like, a lot. But guess what? I love buying them for my kids even more.
Unfortunately, when it comes to the topic of alternative spirituality, children’s books are relatively rare. Here’s a list of those I’ve discovered so far. Please let me know of others you discover and fall in love with.
Best Alternative Spirituality Books for Children
Sara, Book 1: Sara Learns the Secret About the Law of Attraction, Esther Hicks and Jerry Hicks Sara, Book 2: Solomon’s Fine Featherless Friend, Esther Hicks Sara, Book 3: A Talking Owl is Worth a Thousand Words!, Esther Hicks Sara and the Foreverness of Friends of a Feather, Esther Hicks and Jerry Hicks Om Baby, Child of the Universe, Schamet Horsfield Sitting Still Like a Frog: Mindfulness Exercises for Kids (and Their Parents), Eline Snel Milton’s Secret, Eckhart Tolle Emir’s Education in the Proper Use of Magical Powers, Jane Roberts New Thought Children Stories, Christopher Morley Emma & Mommy Talk to God, Marianne Williamson I Am, Wayne Dyer and Kristina Tracy Incredible You!, Wayne Dyer and Kristina Tracy It’s Not What You’ve Got!, Wayne Dyer and Kristina Tracy No Excuses!, Wayne Dyer and Kristina Tracy Unstoppable Me!, Wayne Dyer and Kristina Tracy Tiger-Tiger, Is It True?: Four Questions to Make You Smile Again, Byron Katie and Hans Wilhelm The Four Questions: For Henny Penny and Anybody with Stressful Thoughts, Byron Katie and Hans Wilhelm Santa’s God: A Children’s Fable About the Biggest Question Ever,Neale Donald Walsch All the World, Liz Garton Scanlon Oh, The Places You’ll Go!, Dr. Seuss
This self-help success story was contributed by Jack Wright.
Is positive thinking effective for increasing wellness and inner peace? I mean, really. It’s so corny. So Pollyanna. And yet, we spiritual people swear by it. Non-spiritual people, too. We give it credit for so many of our life achievements.
What gives?
I love this question. Really, really love it, partly because the answer isn’t straightforward. So the other week when I ran across an interview with Eckhart Tolle and Dr. Wayne Dyer in which it was asked, my ears perked up.
Strangely, positivity is a very polarizing subject. You have the extreme believers and the extreme haters. The believers think it’s the reason for everything good that ever happens (I’m looking at you, Rhonda Byrne). The haters view these people as not only misled, but downright ridiculous. Barbara Ehrenreich, for example, has become well known for books like Bright-sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America. Not the book idea I’d want to commit to for several years of my working life.
But there are a few less skeptical, more balanced approaches to the anti-positivity argument as well. And I was pleased that in the Dyer-Tolle interview, both shared interesting, balanced perspectives. They agreed that if a person really wants to achieve greater inner peace, positivity isn’t the goal, or even necessarily a great starting point. Instead, they say, work on being true to yourself, being honest–even if there’s some difficult emotions that come up.
Then Dyer mentioned Anita Moorjani, who wrote a book (Dying to Be Me) about her near death experience and what she learned from it. In it, she says that it’s not about positive thinking. It’s not about manufacturing good feelings where there are none. It’s not about mantras, and the law of attraction, and The Secret, and Norman Vincent Peale.
Positive thinking is a mere substitute for the real thing. Real enlightenment. Real joy. Real love.
It’ll only get you part of the way.
Pema Chodron would likely agree. Her (awesome) books are full of insights about the importance of honesty and authenticity–even suffering. She has a ton–really, just a ton–of amazing quotes on this topic. Here’s one, from When Things Fall Apart: “To stay with that shakiness—to stay with a broken heart, with a rumbling stomach, with the feeling of hopelessness and wanting to get revenge—that is the path of true awakening. Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic—this is the spiritual path.”
So, okay. Maybe positive thinking isn’t all it’s touted to be. But, well–what is, right? Any idea that has entered the popular consciousness with as much force and repetition (not to mention anecdotal and even scientific evidence, a la the placebo effect) suffers from oversimplification syndrome. Maybe positivity isn’t the cure-all, or even one of the truly great spiritual practices out there. That doesn’t mean I’m giving it up anytime soon.
Briefly, here’s my take: I’ve experienced chronic dysthemia (low-level depression) for most of my life. Spirituality and prayer have always been a source of help for me, as have many other practices. But the very first true breakthrough I ever experienced regarding my depression resulted from reading a book on changing one’s thoughts. It was called Telling Yourself the Truth: Find Your Way Out of Depression, Anxiety, Fear, Anger, and Other Common Problems by Applying the Principles of Misbelief Therapy, and I still recommend it to this day (though there are other, similar books on the subject I prefer now). The basic message: your negative thoughts are responsible for your negative feelings. To change the feeling, change the thought. Oh, and by the way, those negative thoughts aren’t true, anyway–not nearly as true as the more objective–and yes, more positive–alternative perspectives.
The message was simple, and in some ways quite obvious, and yet, as a Christian who had always relied on prayer alone for healing, it was radical to me. When I began “taking my thoughts captive,” as the Bible teaches, I was finally able to cap off some of the depression.
These days, I use positive thinking as a tool every day of my life, both in a knee-jerk sort of way and as a dedicated journaling practice. Don’t get me wrong–I’d love to be more like Eckhart Tolle, who is able to “just be.” And Moorjani, who tells us that rather than try to drum up better-feeling thoughts, we should simply live a life that celebrates who we really, authentically are–whatever that may be.
Oh, the infamous law of attraction. We’ve all heard about it, and have potentially practiced it. There are some people who believe in the law strongly, while there are others that think it’s absolutely ridiculous.
I’ve had amazing experiences practicing positive thinking with the intent of manifesting my goals, but sometimes the greatest beauty comes in the little gifts that we receive from the Universe. Life is made up of moments, not extraordinary events, and the sycronicity that I notice in my day-to-day life is, honestly, what keeps me consistently in awe. Reading about elephants as a commercial comes on about elephants, receiving a call from a friend I was just about to reach out to, sitting next to someone on a flight who’s just as into quantum psychics as I am–these are not coincidences, these events are the law of attraction bringing the frequencies that I emit back into my physical existence. As I’ve become more spiritual, and have ultimately developed more of a direct connection to Source, I’ve seen more and more of this happening. My divine journey IS the destination, and tuning into my higher self allows for my third eye to notice even the most quaint of destined circumstances. I know that it is the grand manifestations, though, that are more sexy–and I’ve had my fair share of those as well.
Three months prior to my 21st birthday, I made the decision to move to Colorado to embark on the biggest adventure of my young life. I didn’t have any friends there, any family, a job, a place to live; heck, I’d never even visited the place before. But what I did have was a strong determination and unwavering faith that I was following my heart, my intuition, and the spiritual place where my guides speak to me. I knew it HAD to work out.
So, a month prior to leaving I flew out with my mother to find a place to live. I had my list of apartments with a perfectly calculated route to optimize our time there. Three days flew by, and . . . nothing. I felt discouraged as we began to accept the fact that our trip was failure.
Then, on our way back to our hotel, we passed a leasing company. I toured a beautiful apartment in Denver’s affluent Wash Park area that just so happened to be right in my price range. I was approved without a job, and made the big move a weekend after I turned 21. I then found an amazing job within two weeks of my move, and have had the opportunity to work with many inspiring start-up companies. My plan was live there for a year, but it took four years for my adventure to come to a completion in the beautiful state of Colorado. I would not be the person I am today without having made that move.
Six months after moving back to the state of Texas, I decided to take another leap of faith and quit my corporate job to launch my own marketing start-up company, The Auzenne Agency, which has allowed me the freedom to live my life according to my own terms. It has allowed for more time with family, the means to travel when I please, and to also truly make a true impact on other start-up companies.
Thinking positive thoughts emits positive energy which brings about the intuitive guidance for inspired action to achieve all that your heart desires.
Me: People describe the feeling of meditation in different ways. For some, it’s just relaxation. For me, it’s slightly increased peace–a bit of space between myself and my neurotic mind. What does meditation feel like to you?
Leta: When I meditate, I see myself as the vast universe. I feel a hugeness from the inside out that can only be described as vast empty space. When I see a photo of the universe, of galaxies and the lights emerging from them, the colors they display, I feel that is the best description, visually speaking, of what I feel inwardly as I meditate.
I feel the whole universe is the space of my inner self.
This feeling is cherished and it is why I return to meditation again and again. Even when I have moments without meditation (without that feeling of vastness from the inside out), I remember it and return to it. Whether I am in the kitchen, car or store, I return to the vastness I feel when I am in meditation. Maybe that explains why I maintain the notion that meditation is more than just sitting with eyes closed and legs crossed. It is any time the feeling of vastness comes over me.
Me: Are you able to feel this anytime, even when you’re not alone?
Leta: It is harder to accomplish in the company of others. When I am with others, I am pulled back into the world and the illusion of separation. I am pulled into the physicality present in our form-sense orientation. I am reminded of my humanness when I am with others. This is not a bad thing in and of itself. However, I desire the balance of isolation as well to accompany it. I desire my own time without having to speak to another soul as much as I desire human interaction, love, friendship, and all the things intertwined with human-experiencing.
So I only have this to say: meditate. Breathe. Give back to society in whatever way you can. Volunteer. Think about others in everything you do. Lose yourself happily, because you are seeking nothing. Nothing means no-thing. Give yourself permission not to have goals–to have the goal of loving what is every moment.
That is the most awesome goal of all.
Vision boards, the law of attraction, bringing into your reality what you visualize/hold in your mind, etc., are part of the game of living on earth and they have their place, but I am more interested in being the galaxy and all the galaxies. I am more interested in returning to that place of great big BIG-ness that I feel when I meditate.
It must be a rush of endorphins or whatever brain chemicals rush through my skull that cause me to be so drawn to that meditative state. It is pure bliss and it comes whenever I am focused, steady and silent in my Self. It comes whenever I tell it to, but that is after years of practice.
This self-help success story was contributed by Jenny Thorne.
In the world of alternative spirituality, it’s become a bit of a cliche: Everything we see, everything we experience, is merely ourselves, reflected back at us. We are here to discover who we really are, say our Buddhist teachers (like the great Pema Chodron) and our channels (like Esther Hicks, Jane Roberts and many others). This is supposed to make us feel better when things go wrong, I suppose; it’s not really happening, right?
But that isn’t the only reason we appreciate this teaching. We also like it because it gives us a sense of control. In his awesome pop psychology bestseller, What Makes Your Brain Happy and Why You Should Do the Opposite, David DiSalvo tells us about the human mind’s neurotic need for certainty and understanding–even in the face of very few facts.
Knowing what’s really going on at all times–with ourselves and everyone around us–is a major driving force of our actions and thoughts, he writes. There is a distinct physical and chemical pleasure response from coming up with a reason or explanation–no matter how accurate that explanation may be.
Enter all kinds of false conclusions. We even assign meaning to pure coincidence, making causal inferences from scant information.
So in a sense, believing the world is a projection of our own minds is a pretty attractive scenario. If I can change my mind, I can change my life, we conclude. Who doesn’t want that kind of power?
However, there’s a flip side to this perceived super power, a quandary to consider: What about when something goes wrong? Who do we blame when someone is truly mean, truly heinous, truly inconsiderate, truly . . . well, wrong?
Hmmmm . . . . That’s a hard one, isn’t it?
Clearly, your partner was not being nice when he told you he’d rather spend a night out with the guys than with you. Obviously, your mother should never suggest you go on a diet, and your sister is unfair to expect you to babysit her kids every week.
I mean, let’s face it: It’s one thing to believe in theory that everything that happens is a just projection of ourselves. It’s another thing entirely to act like we believe it, to truly believe that we’re the only ones responsible for our reality.
Some spiritual-but-not-religious folks have a code word for what happens when things go wrong. They call it “co-creation.” They think that even enlightened people experience bad stuff on occasion (in other words, even Esther Hicks gets sick). This is because, well, we’re not really the only ones out here on this plane of reality. And some, but not all, of the out-there stuff affects us.
We’re all in this thing together.
Another explanation, which I like even better, comes from a lesser-known but equally awesome teacher named Matt Kahn. (Get a free long excerpt of his book, Whatever Arises, Love That, here.) Kahn says that when bad stuff happens, it’s not because you didn’t create or visualize right; it’s because there’s some serious work going on inside you. The idea is similar to the Buddhist idea of working out one’s karma. (See Kahn’s video, “The Karmic Return,” for more.)
For quite a while, I accepted these explanations, and in fact I still do–partly. I do believe (for now, anyway) that there really are other people out there, and that those other people are actually doing things. If reality is a projection, I think it’s a collective one.
However, there’s another layer to this idea that I only recently truly discovered. And the teacher that led me to it was Byron Katie.
Here is Katie’s take on the topic in a nutshell. She says that it’s not that so-called “bad” stuff never happens to enlightened or “advanced” people. (She probably gets her disproportionate share of hate mail, for example, due to her nobody-is-a-victim philosophy.) But when you know that a comment just isn’t true, that comment doesn’t feel truly mean to you anymore. Instead, it just feels like pain. It feels like an angry child is speaking to you, someone who doesn’t understand you–someone who’s hurt and afraid.
Recently, I started using Byron Katie’s method of questioning my negative beliefs, and it has really changed things for me. I didn’t realize how negative I was until I started writing down the automatic thoughts in my mind. From the first time I did The Work (Byron Katie’s name for her process, which is similar to cognitive behavioral therapy), I was able to step back significantly from my experiences and realize that what happens to me isn’t really what’s happening to me. What’s happening to me is what’s happening in my own mind.
Needless to say, this was an incredibly freeing revelation.
I love a heartfelt, person-to-person alternative spirituality blog. And of course, I love to hear different perspectives on spirituality–not just articles, but real opinions. These bloggers deliver on all these points. Hope you like them, too.
He’s not just spiritual. He’s creative. And his whole mission in life is to inspire you to be more creative, too–to make your dreams into goals, and goals into achievements. (Oh, and he’s a really good writer.)
Snarky. Sarcastic. Super fun. Spiritual. All the stuff we want from a blogger. Her posts are long and very well thought-out. And she’s got a huge following, and a book.
Normally, I don’t do online videos. I like the quiet too much. But I’ve gotten addicted to Byron Katie’s amazing, life-altering perspective. She is my new guru, for sure.
What a duo these two are. And their message is really exceptional. Their blog could use a little more TLC, but I like keeping their work in my thoughts and learning about what they’re up to. And if you haven’t yet seen a Matt Kahn YouTube video, well, you may not yet truly be living. His videos are his real blog.
I’ve been following Centrella for some years now, and she’s come a long way, baby. Her book, Hustle Believe Receive, is awesome, and I enjoy her vulnerability on topics from motherhood to midlife.
Spirituality, science, philosophy–always a great combination. This is a blog for people who like to keep up on the latest research in spiritual practice, particularly Buddhist practices and meditation.
Nedkov is a spiritual counselor, and her posts seek to inspire you to treat yourself with more kindness, love and grace. She uses A Course in Miracles as her basic text.
Hesselink asks tough questions, then answers them from her unique perspective. She doesn’t put on airs, though–this is a real person just telling it like she sees it.
Pavlina is a channel who writes about reincarnation, divination, omens and the like, bringing some common sense to her uncommon ability. Here’s a sample of her direct writing style:
“Let’s say you’re some bloke named Oliver Queen and you die, are you still Oliver Queen on the other side, like forever? Or do you become someone else? Something else?
People ask me variations of this question a lot …”
Other Top Alternative Spirituality Blogs:
Maybe these aren’t so much blogs as just websites with a bunch of good content. Either way, they merit attention, for obvious reasons. (Namely, that they have a huge following and promote authors who have changed the world.)
On a cold Friday the 13th in January over a decade ago, I signed the mortgage agreement for my first home. And I wasn’t scared about it at all. Though I wasn’t exactly rich–I’d decided that waiting tables was my true calling, at least for a while–I believed that by saving every dollar I could and paying at least a little ahead on the mortgage each month, I just might be able to pay off the house in ten years. With that goal in mind, I took in renters and saved every dollar I could. I didn’t drive a car, for instance. And sometimes I even passed up the bus, deciding it wasn’t worth that $1 fee.
Five years later, I was nowhere close to my goal, but I didn’t worry about that–I just kept making payments. Something in me told me that it would all work out as it should.
I married my first husband, and worked as much as I could, using most of my earnings for the house. Then I divorced and married my husband, which gave me another big edge. Still, the goal was pretty far away. Then the year before having my second child, I got a great job, and started paying in big chunks. Finally, the day came when my husband gave me the approval to take the twenty grand out of our savings account and pay our very last installment.
In the February nine years after signing the mortgage, I made the final payment on the house–nearly one year ahead of schedule.
I believe in hard work. And planning, and being careful with money. But I also believe in the power of setting an clearly defined intention.
What could be better than reading direct revelations from the other side? Not much, as it turns out. Channeled books give us something we get nowhere else: crazy-sounding rants from spiritual beings who for various reasons haven’t quite perfected their English grammar.
Oh, and some unique, life-changing firsthand insights, too.
For these reasons, Best Channeled Books is a book category that’s close to my heart, as it may be to yours. I chose the books in the first section because they inspired me deeply, changed me for the better and helped me find greater inner peace. The second section features all of the other channeled books I’ve come across but may not have read yet. Let me know what I’ve missed and I will update this list and likely promptly devour.
Best Channeled Books
Conversations with God, Parts One through Three, Neale Donald Walsch The Law of Attraction: The Basics of the Teachings of Abraham, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham Ask and It Is Given: Learning to Manifest Your Desires, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham The Magical Approach: Seth Speaks About the Art of Creative Living, Jane Roberts and Seth Seth Speaks: The Eternal Validity of the Soul, Jane Roberts and Seth Whatever Arises, Love That, Matt Kahn A New Dispensation: Plain Talk for Confusing Times, Kryon Book Ten, Lee Carroll and Kryon 100 Daily Messages Volumes One through Four, Leta Hamilton and Archangel Michael
Other Recommended Channeled Books
Neale Donald Walsch
Friendship with God, Neale Donald Walsch Communion with God, Neale Donald Walsch The New Revelations, Neale Donald Walsch Tomorrow’s God: Our Greatest Spiritual Challenge,Neale Donald Walsch Home with God, Neale Donald Walsch
Neale Donald Walsch Books That Aren’t Channeled
Conversations with God – Guidebook, Book 1, Nancy Ways Conversations with God – Guidebook, Book 2, Anne-Marie Barbier Conversations with God – Guidebook, Book 3, Alissa Goefron The Conversations with God Companion: The Essential Tool for Individual and Group Study,Neale Donald Walsch Conversations with God for Teens,Neale Donald Walsch Conversations with God for Teens Guidebook,Neale Donald Walsch Conversations With God for Parents: Sharing the Messages with Children,Neale Donald Walsch Meditations from Conversations With God,Neale Donald Walsch Meditations from Conversations With God: Book 1,Neale Donald Walsch Meditations from Conversations With God, Book 2: A Personal Journal,Neale Donald Walsch Questions and Answers on Conversations With God,Neale Donald Walsch The Wedding Vows from Conversations With God,Neale Donald Walsch and Nancy Fleming-Walsch Neale Donald Walsch on Relationships,Neale Donald Walsch Neale Donald Walsch on Holistic Living,Neale Donald Walsch Neale Donald Walsch on Abundance and Right Livelihood,Neale Donald Walsch Applications for Living from Conversations With God (compilation of three books; Relationships, Holistic Living, and Abundance and Right Livelihood),Neale Donald Walsch Bringers of the Light,Neale Donald Walsch Recreating Your Self,Neale Donald Walsch Moments of Grace: When God Touches Our Lives Unexpectedly, Neale Donald Walsch Part of the Change: Your Role As A Spiritual Helper,Neale Donald Walsch Happier Than God: Turn Ordinary Life into an Extraordinary Experience,Neale Donald Walsch When Everything Changes, Change Everything: In a Time of Turmoil, a Pathway to Peace,Neale Donald Walsch The Little Book of Life: A User’s Manual,Neale Donald Walsch The Mother of Invention: The Legacy of Barbara Marx Hubbard and the Future of YOU,Neale Donald Walsch When God Steps In, Miracles Happen,Neale Donald Walsch The Storm Before the Calm,Neale Donald Walsch What God Wants: A Compelling Answer to Humanity’s Biggest Question, Neale Donald Walsch The Only Thing That Matters,Neale Donald Walsch What God Said,Neale Donald Walsch God’s Message To The World: You’ve Got Me All Wrong,Neale Donald Walsch Conversations with God: The Making of the Movie, Monty Jones with Neale Donald Walsch Re-Minder Cards: Conversations With God, Book 1,Neale Donald Walsch
Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham
Money, and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Wealth, Health, and Happiness, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham The Vortex: Where the Law of Attraction Assembles All Cooperative Relationships, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham The Amazing Power of Deliberate Intent: Living the Art of Allowing, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham The Teachings of Abraham: The Master Course CD Program, 11-CD set, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham Getting Into The Vortex: Guided Meditations CD and User Guide, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham The Astonishing Power of Emotions: Let Your Feelings Be Your Guide, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham A New Beginning I: Handbook for Joyous Survival, Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham A New Beginning II: A Personal Handbook to Enhance Your Life, Liberty and Pursuit of Happiness,Esther Hicks, Jerry Hicks and Abraham
Jane Roberts and Seth
The Nature of Personal Reality, Jane Roberts and Seth The Seth Material, Jane Roberts The “Unknown” Reality, Volume One, Jane Roberts and Seth The “Unknown” Reality, Volume Two, Jane Roberts and Seth The Nature of the Psyche: Its Human Expression, Jane Roberts and Seth Dreams, Evolution and Value Fulfillment, Volume One, Jane Roberts and Seth Dreams, Evolution and Value Fulfillment, Volume Two, Jane Roberts and Seth A Seth Reader, Jane Roberts The Early Sessions (Sessions 1 through 510 of the Seth Material), Jane Roberts The Personal Sessions, Jane Roberts The Early Class Sessions, Jane Roberts Seth, Dreams and Projection of Consciousness, Jane Roberts
Jane Roberts Books That Aren’t Channeled
How To Develop Your ESP Power/ The Coming of Seth, Jane Roberts Adventures in Consciousness: An Introduction to Aspect Psychology, Jane Roberts Dialogues of the Soul and Mortal Self in Time, Jane Roberts Psychic Politics: An Aspect Psychology Book, Jane Roberts The Individual and the Nature of Mass Events, Jane Roberts The Oversoul Seven Trilogy, Jane Roberts The God of Jane: A Psychic Manifesto, Jane Roberts If We Live Again, Or, Public Magic and Private Love, Jane Roberts
Lee Carroll and Kryon
The End Times: New Information for Personal Peace, Kryon Book One, Lee Carroll and Kryon Don’t Think Like a Human: Channelled Answers to Basic Questions, Kryon Book Two, Lee Carroll and Kryon Alchemy of the Human Spirit: A Guide to Human Transition into the New Age, Kryon Book Three, Lee Carroll and Kryon The Parables of Kryon, Kryon Book Four, Lee Carroll and Kryon The Journey Home, Kryon Book Five, Lee Carroll and Kryon Partnering with God: Practical Information for the New Millennium, Kryon Book Six, Lee Carroll and Kryon Letters from Home: Loving Messages from the Family, Kryon Book Seven, Lee Carroll and Kryon Passing The Marker: Understanding the New Millennium Energy, Kryon Book Eight, Lee Carroll and Kryon The New Beginning: 2002 and Beyond, Kryon Book Nine, Lee Carroll and Kryon Lifting the Veil: The New Energy Apolcalypse, Kryon Book Eleven, Lee Carroll and Kryon The Twelve Layers of DNA: An Esoteric Study of the Mastery Within, Kryon Book Twelve, Lee Carroll and Kryon The Recalibration of Humanity: 2013 and Beyond, Kryon Book Thirteen, Lee Carroll and Kryon
Lee Carroll Books That Aren’t Channeled
The Indigo Children: The New Kids Have Arrived, Lee Carroll Indigo Celebration: More Messages, Stories, and Insights from the Indigo Children, Lee Carroll The Indigo Children Ten Years Later: What’s Happening with the Indigo Teenagers!, Lee Carroll and Jan Tober
Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias
The Creator Series, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Live Your Divinity, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Journey of the Angels, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Masters in the New Energy, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Act of Consciousness, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Crimson Circle Library (video, audio and text), Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias The Tobias Materials: The Creator Series – New Tools for Our New Spiritual Journey, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Masters in the New Energy, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias A Letter to Awakening Humans, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Call to Awaken (Audio CD), Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Opening into Consciousness – A Guided Experience (Audio CD), Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias The Twelve Signs of Your Awakening Divinity, Geoffrey Hoppe and Tobias Journey of the Angels: The Tobias Materials, Geoffrey Hoppe, Tobias and Linda Benyo
Other Recommended Channeled Books and Channels
A Course in Miracles, Helen Shucman The Great Human Potential: Walking in One’s Own Light, Wendy Kennedy Darryl Anka and Bashar A Vision, W.B. Yeats The Great Shift: Co-Creating a New World for 2012 and Beyond, Martine Vallee The Secret of Effortless Doing: Be . . . And It Will Be, Ronny and Zach Sivan Oahspe Bible, John Ballou Newbrough The Cosmic Tradition, Max Theon and Alma Theon Book of the Law, Aleister Crowley Toward the Light, Johanne Agerskov Arten and Pursah Channelings, Gary Renard The Aquarian Gospel of Jesus the Christ, Levi H. Dowling The Urantia Book George Van Tassel Gina Lake Eileen Caddy Chelsea Quinn Yarbro JZ Knight Rueckert John Edward Sylvia Browne James Van Praagh Lisa Williams John Holland Sally Morgan Vladimir Megre
Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages
Mollie: Other than saying “I love you, God” repeatedly, is there something you do to stay in touch with the Divine during the day? What do you do when you’re at loose ends?
Leta: When I am at loose ends, I usually muscle test. Muscle testing has been a huge tool in my life and I use it every day. (For more on this, read David Hawkins’ Power Versus Force.) This technique is so useful in my life I don’t know how to emphasize it strongly enough.
Loose ends means time to check in. I think of many things … and check in as I go along. Sometimes the guidance is to just sit, breathe, be patient, wait. Sometimes the guidance is to move to a different room. Sometimes it is to write. Sometimes to watch TV. There is no rule to it.
Listening, centering and checking in are my go-to pauses when I don’t know where to go next, what to do next. I wait until the thing comes. Often, it is a small micro-movement. It can be as simple as turning my body in a different direction.
I think that is why I am called to do yoga once a week. It is full of micro-movements. That is such a big thing for me. I was just thinking about that today … the micro-movements of my yoga class. It totally makes sense now.
I have a fun time on Netflix. I watch these shows that I love and just learn, learn, learn about people. The kids are directed by me about a fifth of the time and the rest is left to peers, Dad, TV and all the rest of the world (church, extended family, school, etc.).
It feels like a balance to me. If that helps, then I am glad. I never know if I am helping or not.
I just do my best to love God. That is pretty much the meaning of everything to me. To love God creates joy in my heart. I love God so much. I can’t express enough how much the love of God plays into my being-ness from moment to moment. It is the reason I live. I feel like a religious fanatic … but that really is how I function from day to day. Life is getting through the days learning how to love God more. God is not a concept or an idea, but a living energy that flows through me with every breath.
