Category Archives: Self-Help Success Stories

Self-Help Success Story: Jack Wright: “I Tried Positive Thinking for Depression”

This self-help success story was contributed by Jack Wright.

Is positive thinking effective for increasing wellness and inner peace? I mean, really. It’s so corny. So Pollyanna. And yet, we spiritual people swear by it. Non-spiritual people, too. We give it credit for so many of our life achievements.

What gives?

I love this question. Really, really love it, partly because the answer isn’t straightforward. So the other week when I ran across an interview with Eckhart Tolle and Dr. Wayne Dyer in which it was asked, my ears perked up.

Strangely, positivity is a very polarizing subject. You have the extreme believers and the extreme haters. The believers think it’s the reason for everything good that ever happens (I’m looking at you, Rhonda Byrne). The haters view these people as not only misled, but downright ridiculous. Barbara Ehrenreich, for example, has become well known for books like Bright-sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America. Not the book idea I’d want to commit to for several years of my working life.

But there are a few less skeptical, more balanced approaches to the anti-positivity argument as well. And I was pleased that in the Dyer-Tolle interview, both shared interesting, balanced perspectives. They agreed that if a person really wants to achieve greater inner peace, positivity isn’t the goal, or even necessarily a great starting point. Instead, they say, work on being true to yourself, being honest–even if there’s some difficult emotions that come up.

Then Dyer mentioned Anita Moorjani, who wrote a book (Dying to Be Me) about her near death experience and what she learned from it. In it, she says that it’s not about positive thinking. It’s not about manufacturing good feelings where there are none. It’s not about mantras, and the law of attraction, and The Secret, and Norman Vincent Peale.

Positive thinking is a mere substitute for the real thing. Real enlightenment. Real joy. Real love.

It’ll only get you part of the way.

Pema Chodron would likely agree. Her (awesome) books are full of insights about the importance of honesty and authenticity–even suffering. She has a ton–really, just a ton–of amazing quotes on this topic. Here’s one, from When Things Fall Apart: “To stay with that shakiness—to stay with a broken heart, with a rumbling stomach, with the feeling of hopelessness and wanting to get revenge—that is the path of true awakening. Sticking with that uncertainty, getting the knack of relaxing in the midst of chaos, learning not to panic—this is the spiritual path.”

So, okay. Maybe positive thinking isn’t all it’s touted to be. But, well–what is, right? Any idea that has entered the popular consciousness with as much force and repetition (not to mention anecdotal and even scientific evidence, a la the placebo effect) suffers from oversimplification syndrome. Maybe positivity isn’t the cure-all, or even one of the truly great spiritual practices out there. That doesn’t mean I’m giving it up anytime soon.

Briefly, here’s my take: I’ve experienced chronic dysthemia (low-level depression) for most of my life. Spirituality and prayer have always been a source of help for me, as have many other practices. But the very first true breakthrough I ever experienced regarding my depression resulted from reading a book on changing one’s thoughts. It was called Telling Yourself the Truth: Find Your Way Out of Depression, Anxiety, Fear, Anger, and Other Common Problems by Applying the Principles of Misbelief Therapy, and I still recommend it to this day (though there are other, similar books on the subject I prefer now). The basic message: your negative thoughts are responsible for your negative feelings. To change the feeling, change the thought. Oh, and by the way, those negative thoughts aren’t true, anyway–not nearly as true as the more objective–and yes, more positive–alternative perspectives.

The message was simple, and in some ways quite obvious, and yet, as a Christian who had always relied on prayer alone for healing, it was radical to me. When I began “taking my thoughts captive,” as the Bible teaches, I was finally able to cap off some of the depression.

These days, I use positive thinking as a tool every day of my life, both in a knee-jerk sort of way and as a dedicated journaling practice. Don’t get me wrong–I’d love to be more like Eckhart Tolle, who is able to “just be.” And Moorjani, who tells us that rather than try to drum up better-feeling thoughts, we should simply live a life that celebrates who we really, authentically are–whatever that may be.

I’m working on it.

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “Meditation Gives Me a Feeling of Vastness”

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages

Me: People describe the feeling of meditation in different ways. For some, it’s just relaxation. For me, it’s slightly increased peace–a bit of space between myself and my neurotic mind. What does meditation feel like to you?

Leta: When I meditate, I see myself as the vast universe. I feel a hugeness from the inside out that can only be described as vast empty space. When I see a photo of the universe, of galaxies and the lights emerging from them, the colors they display, I feel that is the best description, visually speaking, of what I feel inwardly as I meditate.

I feel the whole universe is the space of my inner self.

This feeling is cherished and it is why I return to meditation again and again. Even when I have moments without meditation (without that feeling of vastness from the inside out), I remember it and return to it. Whether I am in the kitchen, car or store, I return to the vastness I feel when I am in meditation. Maybe that explains why I maintain the notion that meditation is more than just sitting with eyes closed and legs crossed. It is any time the feeling of vastness comes over me.

Me: Are you able to feel this anytime, even when you’re not alone?

Leta: It is harder to accomplish in the company of others. When I am with others, I am pulled back into the world and the illusion of separation. I am pulled into the physicality present in our form-sense orientation. I am reminded of my humanness when I am with others. This is not a bad thing in and of itself. However, I desire the balance of isolation as well to accompany it. I desire my own time without having to speak to another soul as much as I desire human interaction, love, friendship, and all the things intertwined with human-experiencing.

So I only have this to say: meditate. Breathe. Give back to society in whatever way you can. Volunteer. Think about others in everything you do. Lose yourself happily, because you are seeking nothing. Nothing means no-thing. Give yourself permission not to have goals–to have the goal of loving what is every moment.

That is the most awesome goal of all.

Vision boards, the law of attraction, bringing into your reality what you visualize/hold in your mind, etc., are part of the game of living on earth and they have their place, but I am more interested in being the galaxy and all the galaxies. I am more interested in returning to that place of great big BIG-ness that I feel when I meditate.

It must be a rush of endorphins or whatever brain chemicals rush through my skull that cause me to be so drawn to that meditative state. It is pure bliss and it comes whenever I am focused, steady and silent in my Self. It comes whenever I tell it to, but that is after years of practice.

Love.

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Jenny Thorne: “What’s Happening to Me Is What’s Happening In My Own Mind–Nowhere Else”

woman holding her head — *Photo by Kat Smith on Pexels.com*

This self-help success story was contributed by Jenny Thorne.

In the world of alternative spirituality, it’s become a bit of a cliche: Everything we see, everything we experience, is merely ourselves, reflected back at us. We are here to discover who we really are, say our Buddhist teachers (like the great Pema Chodron) and our channels (like Esther Hicks, Jane Roberts and many others). This is supposed to make us feel better when things go wrong, I suppose; it’s not really happening, right?

But that isn’t the only reason we appreciate this teaching. We also like it because it gives us a sense of control. In his awesome pop psychology bestseller, What Makes Your Brain Happy and Why You Should Do the Opposite, David DiSalvo tells us about the human mind’s neurotic need for certainty and understanding–even in the face of very few facts.

Knowing what’s really going on at all times–with ourselves and everyone around us–is a major driving force of our actions and thoughts, he writes. There is a distinct physical and chemical pleasure response from coming up with a reason or explanation–no matter how accurate that explanation may be.

Enter all kinds of false conclusions. We even assign meaning to pure coincidence, making causal inferences from scant information.

And in Predictably Irrational, Revised and Expanded Edition: The Hidden Forces That Shape Our Decisions, Professor of Behavioral Economics Dan Ariely agrees.

So in a sense, believing the world is a projection of our own minds is a pretty attractive scenario. If I can change my mind, I can change my life, we conclude. Who doesn’t want that kind of power?

However, there’s a flip side to this perceived super power, a quandary to consider: What about when something goes wrong? Who do we blame when someone is truly mean, truly heinous, truly inconsiderate, truly . . . well, wrong?

Hmmmm . . . . That’s a hard one, isn’t it?

Clearly, your partner was not being nice when he told you he’d rather spend a night out with the guys than with you. Obviously, your mother should never suggest you go on a diet, and your sister is unfair to expect you to babysit her kids every week.

I mean, let’s face it: It’s one thing to believe in theory that everything that happens is a just projection of ourselves. It’s another thing entirely to act like we believe it, to truly believe that we’re the only ones responsible for our reality.

Some spiritual-but-not-religious folks have a code word for what happens when things go wrong. They call it “co-creation.” They think that even enlightened people experience bad stuff on occasion (in other words, even Esther Hicks gets sick). This is because, well, we’re not really the only ones out here on this plane of reality. And some, but not all, of the out-there stuff affects us.

We’re all in this thing together.

Another explanation, which I like even better, comes from a lesser-known but equally awesome teacher named Matt Kahn. (Get a free long excerpt of his book, Whatever Arises, Love That, here.) Kahn says that when bad stuff happens, it’s not because you didn’t create or visualize right; it’s because there’s some serious work going on inside you. The idea is similar to the Buddhist idea of working out one’s karma. (See Kahn’s video, “The Karmic Return,” for more.)

For quite a while, I accepted these explanations, and in fact I still do–partly. I do believe (for now, anyway) that there really are other people out there, and that those other people are actually doing things. If reality is a projection, I think it’s a collective one.

However, there’s another layer to this idea that I only recently truly discovered. And the teacher that led me to it was Byron Katie.

Here is Katie’s take on the topic in a nutshell. She says that it’s not that so-called “bad” stuff never happens to enlightened or “advanced” people. (She probably gets her disproportionate share of hate mail, for example, due to her nobody-is-a-victim philosophy.) But when you know that a comment just isn’t true, that comment doesn’t feel truly mean to you anymore. Instead, it just feels like pain. It feels like an angry child is speaking to you, someone who doesn’t understand you–someone who’s hurt and afraid.

Recently, I started using Byron Katie’s method of questioning my negative beliefs, and it has really changed things for me. I didn’t realize how negative I was until I started writing down the automatic thoughts in my mind. From the first time I did The Work (Byron Katie’s name for her process, which is similar to cognitive behavioral therapy), I was able to step back significantly from my experiences and realize that what happens to me isn’t really what’s happening to me. What’s happening to me is what’s happening in my own mind.

Needless to say, this was an incredibly freeing revelation.

I would really, really love for you to go down the Byron Katie rabbit hole with me. For a very short video introduction to her view on this topic, watch “Byron Katie explains a post: ‘Your partner’s flaws are your own, because you’re projecting them” on YouTube.

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “Loving God Gives Me Joy"

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages

Mollie: Other than saying “I love you, God” repeatedly, is there something you do to stay in touch with the Divine during the day? What do you do when you’re at loose ends?

Leta: When I am at loose ends, I usually muscle test. Muscle testing has been a huge tool in my life and I use it every day. (For more on this, read David Hawkins’ Power Versus Force.) This technique is so useful in my life I don’t know how to emphasize it strongly enough.

Loose ends means time to check in. I think of many things … and check in as I go along. Sometimes the guidance is to just sit, breathe, be patient, wait. Sometimes the guidance is to move to a different room. Sometimes it is to write. Sometimes to watch TV. There is no rule to it.

Listening, centering and checking in are my go-to pauses when I don’t know where to go next, what to do next. I wait until the thing comes. Often, it is a small micro-movement. It can be as simple as turning my body in a different direction.

I think that is why I am called to do yoga once a week. It is full of micro-movements. That is such a big thing for me. I was just thinking about that today … the micro-movements of my yoga class. It totally makes sense now.

I have a fun time on Netflix. I watch these shows that I love and just learn, learn, learn about people. The kids are directed by me about a fifth of the time and the rest is left to peers, Dad, TV and all the rest of the world (church, extended family, school, etc.).

It feels like a balance to me. If that helps, then I am glad. I never know if I am helping or not.

I just do my best to love God. That is pretty much the meaning of everything to me. To love God creates joy in my heart. I love God so much. I can’t express enough how much the love of God plays into my being-ness from moment to moment. It is the reason I live. I feel like a religious fanatic … but that really is how I function from day to day. Life is getting through the days learning how to love God more. God is not a concept or an idea, but a living energy that flows through me with every breath.

I love God!!! I don’t know how else to put it.

Thank you for letting me share. Peace out!

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “If I Don’t Love It, I Love That I Don’t Love It”

worms eyeview of well — *Photo by Filipe Delgado on Pexels.com*

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages.

Me: Sometimes it’s hard for me to love his thing we call God, or to even know whether I should. I mean, maybe just loving people is enough. Yes? No? How do you love God, when there’s no face to God?

Leta: I love God as a force at the heart of life. I feel it as a breathtakingly spiritual power at the center of all things, beyond faces, physicality or form. It is not human. It is like Chi of Taoism. It is everywhere, in everything (including me) and part of all expressions of existence. It is like electricity. It is. It has a quality to it that is all-powerful and God-like in a conventional sense of that word. However, it is beyond anthropomorphism. It cannot be labeled as anything “human” in any way, shape or form. It has Presence in my life without form. It is real like my hand is real, but in a way that defies logic or rational explanations. It is the ineffable.

I am constantly connected to this force and love it with every bit of my being. It brings everything good and wonderful into my life and it is everything–even things that others call “bad,” “unlucky,” “tragedy,” “dis-ease” and so on. These are great gifts from my perspective. They are things that come as ways to grow into myself and ever more close to that God-force I have been talking about. It is love for love’s sake. I have no agenda in it. My name for it is God because that makes the most sense.

Me: Do you have a go-to image or set of images that mean “God” to you?

Leta: No. It is life force. It has no feeling to it that can be described. It has a quality to it that is called “bliss” by the masters and gurus of our planet, but even that cannot adequately describe it. It is subjective and experiential. I would say that I am feeling the same thing that others have described as bliss or enlightenment, but I choose to call it nothing and just experience it. To love your life is enough. I won’t call myself blissed-out or in an enlightened state. I am loving life with my breaths. That is enough.

Me: I love God, too–but I really love LIFE. To me, the definition of God is LIFE. Is that what you mean?

Leta: I mean life and more than life. I mean what makes life possible at all. I mean the divine miracle that life is thrust upon the canvas of All That Is. I mean the interconnectedness of all life across all the cosmos. I mean the thing that exists before life is even a thought and the thing that will be there when all life is singing the swan song of existence. I mean the totality of all dimensions, realms of experience and planes of existence–including the multidimensions of the angelic realms and non-physical planes of existence on this planet (elemental beings). I mean the totality of ALL THAT IS. I cannot explain it any other way. God is a way to describe all of that and MORE. It is close as my breath and beyond anything my brain can comprehend. It is real to me. I cannot say it any other way.

Me: You love all that you see, all the time?

Leta: Yes. Pretty much. And if I don’t love it, I love that I don’t love it. Then I go into myself and contemplate until understanding comes. It takes years sometimes. All the while, I have fun!

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “I Realized That Suffering Is My Friend”

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages.

Me: You once told me that “God is in the poopy diapers.” We were talking about motherhood and such, and you said it casually, but it stuck with me. What exactly did you mean by that?

Leta: David R. Hawkins (Power vs. Force) talks about the perfection of the rusty old garbage can. It is old and rusty, but it is perfect as that. So I think about my life like that. When I have to walk to dog as I did this morning and I think to myself, “I don’t want to be walking this dog,” I am perfectly perfect in that sweet desire not to be doing what I am doing. It is like the rusty garbage can–rusty AND perfect.

When I ask myself, “What do I want?” these answers come up: I want to be with God. I want to expand. I want to find ways to go deeper inside myself and discover new epiphanies along the way.

So what does God do? Gives me opportunities for that. When I see this, I see how the walking of the dog is an answer to that prayer. I see how my kids are the Universe bringing me what I wanted in the form of spiritual supply. I see how the poopy diapers and 4 a.m. wake-up time for the dog to go out are exactly what I had asked for.

Perfect, perfect, perfect IS the rusty garbage can, the dog that I don’t really want, the work in the evening to get homework done when I all I want to do is retreat away from kids for a while and so much more I call “imperfect.”

I have these feelings like, “ugh,” at walking the dog. I think about them, acknowledge them and then see how they are opportunities for me to expand through insights and epiphanies. I realized this morning how win-win it is to walk the dog even though I wanted to be anywhere else! I also checked out a Tich Nach Han CD from the library & he was talking about walking meditations and I focused on that this morning too.

When I had this epiphany it came mostly because I was desperate for a pee. I realized that when I had to pee, I had to focus entirely on getting myself to a place where I could go pee. All that was in my mind was, “Make it back to the car, get the dog in the car and get into Value Village where there is a bathroom.” I was focused in that suffering. I had no other room in my mind for any other thoughts. Then I thought about how liberating suffering can be. It focuses the mind. It creates the conditions where nothing else is flooding us other than that one, focused, thought. I was grateful. I wasn’t busy in my mind. I was truly meditating. It was a meditation of suffering and it was very focusing. Then, I realized that once I peed, I’d have all this space in my mind to be bogged down with all kinds of other thoughts like, “What are we going to have for dinner?” I thought about the moment of freedom from my suffering, but that would also allow a new kind of suffering to come in–the suffering of the busy, chattering, monkey mind.

I realized that suffering was my friend also. It was just as much a part of my liberation as my moments of peace in the heart. When I have expansive perspective, I see that suffering and peace are the same. They are both focus and awareness, one in the direction of “I don’t want this” and one in the direction of “I do want this.” But the coin is the same: eternal being-ness.

With that, I have to go collect my son from preschool, then get home to the dog, then go grocery shopping, then go home again and …. It’s up in the air, but it will be okay however it works out. Hope I don’t find poop in the house when I get back, but I might and it’s going to be a perfect thing no matter what.

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Jenny Thorne: "I Learned to Love What Is"

three red heart balloons — Photo by Kristina Paukshtite on Pexels.com

This self-help success story was contributed by Jenny Thorne.

Readers of Eckhart Tolle understand the importance of appreciating the present moment–paying attention as much as possible to the glorious Now and leaving the past behind us. For a long time, though, I was stumped by something: How am I supposed to live in the present and also allow myself to feel the desires that lead to conscious creation?

What about visualization? What about mantras? What about figuring out what I don’t want so that I can decide what I do want to welcome into my life?

Then the other day, a good friend talked to me about the importance of acceptance.

“Life is perfect, just as it is,” she said. “You don’t have to want a single new thing to be happy.”

And I knew it was true, because she has four young children and she manages it all amazingly well.

So, the following day, I took her advice. I started a new spiritual practice: that of accepting everything that came.

“Bring it on, Universe,” I said. “Do your worst. I’m going to learn to love what is if it kills me.”

And it was the greatest experience. That day I happened to spend most of the sunny afternoon at a park with my two wonderful children. Then that evening I was treated to a massage and a facial. I truly enjoyed these experiences in a way I have rarely done before, without fault-finding and overly critical thinking and too-high expectations.

It was wonderful.

I’m pretty sure the Universe wanted me to have an especially good first try at all this acceptance stuff, because over the following few days things got back to normal. Kids crying till my ears hurt, poopy diapers . . . you get the idea.

But I continued my new-found spiritual practice, and what I noticed right away was that none of the bad stuff seemed all that bad anymore. Because they weren’t that bad. They were the challenges of life.

There’s an amazing quote in The Power of Now (by Eckhart Tolle) about whether or not we as conscious creators should accept that bad stuff happens.

“Is suffering really necessary? Yes and no. If you had not suffered as you have, there would be no depth to you as a human being, no humility, no compassion. You would not be reading this now. Suffering cracks open the shell of ego, and then comes a point when it has served its purpose. Suffering is necessary until you realize it is unnecessary.”

Beautiful, isn’t it? Sometimes we law of attraction believers get down on ourselves for not having everything we want, not outwardly appearing to be as successful as others we know. As much as I believe in and practice visualization, affirmations and meditating on what I desire, and pray to the angels and seek enlightenment and read books and discuss spiritual matters for hours on end . . . I’m remembering through it all that I am in a process. I am experiencing everything–“good” and “bad”–for a reason.

Truly, it is all perfect.

And here’s the really funny part (that you may have guessed already): Ever since my revelation on acceptance, things are flowing better for me, too. What I need and want comes to me in a natural way, at the right time–often before I consciously know I need it.

If you are a dissatisfied spiritual person, someone who wants to become a more positive thinker right now, I encourage you to embrace this paradox.

Accept first. Then work on your deliberate creation.

Accept.

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “When Peace Is Taken Care of, Everything Else Falls Into Place”

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages.

As a mother of young sons, I was seeking balance in my life. I wanted it to be on my terms and not dictated by when I could get out of the house, the schedule of the day spa and/or my husband’s availability to take over childcare while I was away “doing something just for me.” Meditation was a thing I had heard a lot about and I wanted to go there, explore that and make that the focus of my “me” time.

Meditation is something I can do anytime, anywhere. It requires no special equipment. It’s simply me and my body and my mind. Simple does not necessarily mean easy. We have minds busy with chatter. We can and do often become swept away with the parade of thoughts that disrupt us – an inner sense of peace is swallowed up by all those thoughts we think.

Reading up on meditation, I knew it was a way for me to master my thoughts, use my mind as a servant instead of making it my master and create the inner space to allow that peace in. Kids are a source of chaos both internally and externally. We berate ourselves with all the comparisons between ourselves and other parents and our kids and other kids. We also look around to our environments and see things out of place. Toys needing to be picked up, kids wanting to play with objects that are not intended for small hands and a gazillion other ways our external landscapes are thrown into chaos with tiny ones in our lives.

None of this is wrong. Kids will be kids! They need outlets of play for their personal development and I for one did not want to stifle their budding personhoods through my own insecurities and inability to deal with them. After recognizing the benefits of meditation, I set in place the intention to make it a part of my life. I did not know how I would do it, when or where it would happen. I made the declaration of wanting meditation to be a part of my existence and let God do the rest.

Soon enough, I noticed how Oliver would fall asleep in the buggy on our way home from dropping William off at preschool. I took that opportunity to sit in the garden of a park near my home and simply practice breathing. If the weather was too cold or rainy for that, I would roll Oliver into the house still in his buggy and just sit while he slept.

If I was in the car while children were sleeping, I would stay there in the driveway after we arrived home and do nothing other than close my eyes and breathe. I would practice meditation for durations of 2 minutes through to an hour or more.

It was a miraculous “noticing” of space in my life. Whenever I could meditate, I suddenly had the inspiration to do so. It was marvelous how these moments came with precision and regularity. It did not have to be at the same time every day or for the same amount of time. What had shifted in me was the awareness of those moments existing: moments when it was possible, doable, to meditate.

Meditation for me has expanded into a lifelong habit. I meditate now as a way of being. I take time every day to sit quietly and watch my breath internally. I also use meditation as a form of presence. When I am with someone – that is a meditation! It is a meditation of presence, of BE-ing with that person, listening to them and responding from a place of spontaneity. I no longer think what to say ahead of time. I sit with a person in a state of presence-meditation.

When I do the dishes, it is my “dishes meditation” time. I do the dishes with presence. I wash them as if this were the greatest meditation ever. I love the dishes as I clean them. I am with them as a lover. It’s the same with the laundry. I just do the laundry like I would if I were sitting cross-legged in a room of meditation students. Wherever I go, whatever I am doing, I practice it as a meditation. Life is a meditation to me now. It is no longer separate activity from the rest of my life. All of life is calm and meditation.

Of course, there is still noise in my life. With 4 young boys how could there not be? However, my intention of creating life as the meditation makes it easy for the calm to stay inside. I still go off and sit by myself from time to time to regroup and restore an inner sense of balance. I have a chair that is specifically placed in my bedroom for my quiet meditation times. I sit on the floor and focus on beautiful objects that are pleasing to me. I stay in the car when I am able and breath while the baby continues to sleep.

All of these things I do as a habit because meditation is important to me. It’s one of the greatest, if not the greatest, priority of my life. Above caring for my kids, being there for my husband or taking care of personal hygiene I intend the peace meditation brings me. When peace is taken care of, all those other things fall into place so easily and effortlessly. I have noticed how easy my life is and with what grace I am gifted every day. I have peace as a core value. I arrive there through vigilant adherence to the intention that meditation is in my life every day. Then I wait for the opportunities to “pop up” and I take them, I act on them, I do as I am guided and I notice how often it is there is that space for what I desire.

You too can make something a part of your life that you desire. Whether it is more time for meditation or something else, there is something powerful in the intention. Then, it is up to you to notice and act on what is opening up in front of you. Be very open. You will be surprised at how many ways The Universe brings you what you desire.

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Leta Hamilton: “I Am Deeply at Peace”

Contributor: Author Leta Hamilton, whose books include The Way of the Toddler and a four-book series called 100 Daily Messages.

When I told the Universe I wanted more peace, depth within my being and a closeness to God that was manifest in my daily existence, I had no idea how that would play out in experience. I had a very intimate hour with my Self in meditation where I asked from the depths of my being for expansion. It was a conversation that was completely with myself and spoken out loud. I sat for an hour and talked to myself about my desires, my intentions for peace and closeness with God. I gave my heart and soul to the All-ness of All That Is in that moment.

When I found out some months later that I was pregnant, though my husband had a vasectomy some 2-plus years earlier, I was angry, confused and suffering from a bad case of the “Why me?” syndrome. I had a burgeoning career as a writer and speaker, a radio show I loved and not enough time as it was to split between my career/non-mothering goals and my role as parent. It wasn’t meant to be, supposed to be or in any way fair!

Still, here I was with a baby inside of me and halfway through my second trimester. I was over four months along before I finally realized what was going on with my body. With a breastfeeding child already and a busy schedule with three other young ones, I was not paying a lot of attention to my monthly menstrual cycle. I just figured my lack of period was a result of the breastfeeding and moved through each day like “a chicken with its head cut off.”

My epiphany came when I realized that what I had in this pregnancy and this baby was exactly what I had put out there into the universe as an intention. It was the energy of what I desired most: a pathway to peace, greater discoveries of inner depth and perfect beyond perfect for becoming closer to God. Not only is a baby a way for all of us to connect to our God-self, but also the journey of getting to a peaceful state over this very shocking news was the perfect situation from which to explore my relationship with my God-self and become even closer to the All of All That Is.

I am here to say that intentions become reality when they are spoken from a place of authenticity that transcends beliefs, concepts and subliminal programming that may be creating a barrier between our spoken desires and our inner “ideas” about what is possible. As we move through the many-layered playground of mind, we see that we are a collection of beliefs and concepts that are often philosophically opposed. We can desire money and believe that it is the root of all evil. Figuring out our facets as a human is wonderfully fun if we allow it to be. It also allows us to examine our inner beliefs and concepts, discovering incongruities and adherence to the collective consciousness.

We can also examine how societal/cultural norms are at play in our energy and determine where they are serving our expansion as humans and where they are not. All of this inner work allows us to know ourselves, make choices from a place of clarity and authenticity, and freely claim our right to be on this planet. We can love ourselves with abandon when we have explored the inner landscape, loving and embracing what we find there—for it is all blissful discovering!

Becoming pregnant with my fourth child, another son, was everything I had asked for and more. The moment I realized he truly was an answer to prayer, I burst out in laughter. How brilliantly the Universe had delivered to me everything I desired! I am four years into his existence now. My life has changed significantly. On the outside, it may appear that I have given up many of my dreams. I no longer have the radio show. I do not speak to groups as often as I used to. My books don’t sell well and I have the job as Mom more than anything else at the moment. Yet, none of that matters. I am more happy and satisfied than I have ever been. I have the life that I need energetically to create all the wonderful experiences for me to cultivate peace in my heart, figure out my infinite depth and become closer and closer to God in every breath.

I—simply stated—love my life. What more could I ask for? Energetically, I am full, full, full! The law of attraction means for me constantly going within and finding the energy of that which I desire. The thing is a representation of the energy. I skip the middle man of the thing and go straight for the energy. I talk to the universe energetically. I connect to the energy of that which I desire and go into my life now to find where that energy already exists. In that, I find the ways I can be grateful right now. The energy of that which I desire is already evident in my day-to-day existence. Connecting to that evidence through meditation opens up my heart to appreciation that has no words.

Timothy is our answer to prayer! I think how lucky we are to have him. What I see in his eyes, his very presence, is my capacity to attract exactly what I want—in a most unexpected and brilliant way. Gratitude is simply inadequate to express my blessings.

Leta

Self-Help Success Story: Alexander Svitych: “My Days Are Smooth and Calm”

Contributor: Alexander of alexandersvitych.com.

Last week I carried out an experiment. Every day while commuting by metro to work, I self-tuned myself by saying repeatedly: “Today I am going to have a great day. I have enough time for all my tasks. Work comes and goes. The day is calm and smooth.”

Each day of that week went indeed calm and smooth, and I had time to accomplish all my tasks without any rush or stress.

Then, on another day I did not repeat that positive confirmation. And the day turned out to be hectic, stressful and energy-consuming.

Does this mean positive affirmations are crucial for a balanced and harmonious life?

I don’t think so.

Or, to be more precise, I believe they are just one of the factors that influence our lives and adjust the flow of our days. Besides, positive thinking and positive attitude are different things.

Yet perhaps positive affirmations are not fruitless either. At least two useful things that I took for myself are:

They calm down your mind (eliminating “inner talk”);
They assist with focus and concentration.

I still believe that action is the most important ingredient of the recipe–the fifth element, if you wish. The so-called “law of attraction” that has been advertised throughout the world is bollocks if not accompanied with action. However, using positive affirmations is not entirely wrong either.

But let me repeat myself–only if backed up with acting, making and doing.

Alexander

Self-Help Success Story: Evan Griffith: “My Inner Self Is a Four-Year-Old”

black mercedes benz car interior — *Photo by Mike B on Pexels.com*

Guest contributor: Evan Griffith of NotesforCreators.com. Evan’s blog “shares insights on the connected creative life” and is one of my personal favorites.

One day, I was driving to Houston to deliver artwork to a client. The delivery had to be there no later than 7 p.m. that evening. After that no one would be available to receive the art.

It was an enjoyable day, with a great rhythm of rest stops and breaks to make it relaxing . . . .

Until I discovered I’d been driving the wrong direction for an hour . . . putting me two hours out of whack.

I plotted it out. I could maybe possibly just make my destination by the cutoff time that evening . . . if only everything went perfectly well. To the minute.

About 45 minutes later I became aware that while I’d been driving I’d had this demi-conscious thought pattern whispering at me in the background the whole time:

There are going to be traffic problems through the cities.

There’s bad weather along the gulf coast. Everything’s going to slow wayyyyy down. Maybe stop.

There will be accidents.

If you don’t make this delivery tonight, you’re schedule will be thrown way behind. There’s no way you’re going to make it.

This is really going to cost you.

It was a running litany of all the things that could go wrong. Whispering at me from my own mind!

I shouted at this part of my mind – at myself essentially – to shut up. With choicer language.

It quieted down for awhile. Then when my attention drifted the little fucker started right back up.

You’re not going to maaake it. You’re not going to maaaake it!

My inner self is a four-year old.

I knew I had to substitute the programming . . . and commenced speaking about all the things that could go right. I whispered aloud every possible event I could think of that could go my way.

And they did. Through cities and towns and traffic and patches of bad weather. The drive unspooled with wonderful fluidity. I made it with five minutes to spare.

(!)

This was a wake up . . . about how much power my Whisper Self was leeching away from me. After that I caught my Whisper Self repeatedly soft speaking away about this could-be awful thing or that might-turn-out-badly possibility . . .

Now I train this Whisper Self to speak rightly . . . about everything that can and will go right. It’s had an amazing effect on how things turn out — some that border on the miraculous.

Things go better when you’re aligned.

Evan

Self-Help Success Story: Jenny Thorne: “Walking Inspires Me”

true law of attraction story — *This photo courtesy fatseth, a Flickr.com contributor.*

This self-help success story was contributed by Jenny Thorne.

About two months before giving birth to my son, I experienced a personal breakthrough: I started taking walks. A few months before that, I’d read a book about the link between mental and physical health and at the end, the author recommended long, mindful walks as a wellness practice. Though I didn’t start right away, the thought lingered in my head until one day, the desire hit. And as I’ve learned, when the desire to do something hits–something that’s actually good for you–there’s probably a good reason for it.

So, I took a walk. A long, beautiful walk. And even though I had to pee most of the way (seven months pregnant, remember), I loved it. A few days later, I went again, and again a few days after that, and ever since then, it’s been almost an addiction. It gives me a physical high that greatly helps me truly enjoy the rest of my day. It helps me be much more present. Since I’ve suffered from depression for much of my life, it comes as a surprise to me that one of the most effective strategies I’ve found is simple and free.

Self-Help Success Story: Terri Lynn: “I Chose Happiness”

Contributor: Motivational speaker and author Terri Lynn of thinkhappybehappy.com.

As a young child my mother told me that God is always watching. At four or five I went searching everywhere for that God until one day I became aware that I was not alone. I felt the presence within me. At a young age I developed a friendship with God. Later in life I made a prayerfully guided decision during my divorce. Years later that divinely guided decision led me into a living hell. My two young sons moved two hours away with their father. “How does my life look like this?” I wondered. After going through every emotion you can imagine, wanting to die rather than face the next ten years of pain, I came to accept my life and I made the commitment to live happy.

I trained my brain to think happy and became grateful for the divine strength from within that carried me through each day. I learned to play games with my mind to keep it focused on something positive. As I look back I see just how I was divinely guided to the positive side of pain. Pain is a catalyst and is a sign we need to change. Today I am grateful for those years because my sons and I are closer because of our separation. We made every minute together count, and we still do.

To be happy, no matter what, requires taking responsibility and acceptance. The decision to be happy is what creates the experience of being happy and your happiness depends on you.

Terri

Self-Help Success Story: Mandy: “Dancing Helped Me Overcome Depression”

Contributor: Mandy, a professional dancer and dance, yoga and pilates instructor. Read her blog at www.breathingheart.com.

For over two decades, dance has been my passion. It began when I was seven years old when my mother signed me up for ballet lessons. She hoped that I could use up my extra energy learning how to move more elegantly, rather than using it to jump noisily around the house. (I was a little girl who could not sit still for over ten minutes!)

During that very first class, I fell in love with dance. I grew up in a family that didn’t talk very much about feelings, and dance gave me permission to feel and “speak” honestly and freely. My voice was heard through movement.

When I was in the fifth grade, my mother unexpectedly developed cancer and died shortly after the diagnosis. It was an emotional upheaval for me and my family. Later on in life, I didn’t realize that ever since that happened I had been suppressing my grief, anger and fear. Every time I felt bad, I just kept my thoughts and feelings quietly to myself. I was afraid to confront them; I was afraid even to remember them. Later, this suppression became such a problem that I had a hard time verbalizing and communicating when I was angry or upset. My inability to express negative feelings even led to the end of my first romantic relationship.

After that first relationship broke up, I was in a “functional” depression for almost two years. However, this experience taught me tremendous lessons about letting go and how to use positive thinking to change my life. It was during that period that I realized that the loss and the sadness I felt affected the physical function of my heart and lungs–I was actually getting physically weaker each day. At one point, I started having difficulty breathing and got tired very easily. As a dancer, I lost focus, stamina and even had trouble memorizing the choreography.

I knew I could not let my despair continue, so I became determined to get better and live my life again. During the process of healing, I read lots of spiritual books, did meditation, danced and journaled. It took me a while to see hope and happiness again, but eventually, these techniques worked, and now, I have my life back. I realize that nothing can hurt me, except ME. I refuse to be a victim of the past, and I choose to keep loving and to keep laughing no matter what life brings to me.

After realizing this, my life started to change. I started to attract more lovable, supportive and inspiring friends. When my mind feels good, my body feels good; I am just happy, healthy and free right here, right now. Most importantly, I know I am special whether I am on or off the stage.

Mandy

Self-Help Success Story: Jenion: “I Decided That Today, I Would Not Be Anxious”

Guest contributor: Law of attraction believer Jenion, www.jenion.com.

I am a word person. I always have been, though for much of my life I relegated the power of words to my heart. I didn’t know that some words could affect my daily experience, too.

And then the idea of “intention” (and it’s sister concept, the “law of attraction”) exploded on the scene. The New Age movement meets quantum physics! So, along with everyone else, I watched “What the Bleep”, read Lynn Grabhorn’s “Excuse Me, You’re Life is Waiting,” and more–there is no shortage of material out there which says that we can create our own reality and attract into our lives the things we want by “setting our intention.”

I liked these ideas, despite the fact that much of what has been written is tinged with magical thinking and focused on achieving material abundance. Although I’m not bent on earning my first million, I am attracted to the concept that it might be up to me whether any given day is a good day or not. So, since then, I’ve tried several experiments with the idea of intention. One notable example ended up with me getting free meat at the grocery store–it was a fun experiment, but the free meat has not been a replicable outcome. What has and can be replicated, though, is the intention to manage my own choices such that a positive outcome is practically guaranteed.

I remember the first time I approached an annual event, one which I had dreaded every year, with this specific intention: “Today, I will be not be anxious. I will be calm and open to every person who approaches me. If there is a problem, we will resolve it with compassion and respect.” I wrote the intention down, and said it aloud. Each time throughout the day that I began to feel anxiety or my composure began to slip, I would remind myself of the day’s intention.

In the end, it was a great day.

This may be one of the reasons the Gospel of John is my favorite. It’s first sentence “In the beginning was the Word” is perhaps my favorite sentence of all time. It’s followed by: “The Word was with God and was God.” In other words, God’s intention created everything. How amazing and powerful is that? And the light created by that intent has not and cannot be overcome by darkness.

As with every change we try to make in life, practice is called for and perfection is a million miles away. But I have more successfully intentional days now than I did five years ago, or five months ago. And that has, indeed, changed my life forever.

Jenion